Stories's Log
This log represents the Life and Times of the Las Vegas Dude.
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Sat 
02/19/2005 00:00:05
 jim  Gabriel-Rain-Jim,Becky,Dustin,Robert,Amy
Fri 
02/18/2005 12:02:01
 jim  Vegas,NV-Squirt cutee 09
Fri 
02/18/2005 12:00:08
 jim  Vegas,NV-SamsTown
Fri 
02/18/2005 12:00:02
 jim  Vegas,NV-Gabriel Squirt-Cutee
Thu 
02/17/2005 23:00:44
 jim  February 2005
Thursday, February 17, 2005 at 15:35:16 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I just had to pay $1,200 to get my corp back! This is what I have to say about that...
I trusted my accountant to file the paperwork.
The paperwork is simple, easy to fill out and his secretary could have done it.
But because he didn't do it, I had to pay a lot of fines.
Shame on him, and shame on me
It was unethical for him to charge me for filing Corporate papers.
Especially when my Corporate License had been suspended in 2002 due to his error. However, I can't blame him entirely for the screw up.
The bottom line is:
When you own a business, it's up to you to know who, what, where and how much you have pay to run your business.
An accountant is nice, but he should be your friend at the very least.
Mine was not. His brother was, before he was hired as Vice President of local corporation.
Like I said, all of this was my entirely fault.
Thursday, February 17, 2005 at 14:33:53 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Mikeys Got A JOB!!! YEA!
He's going back to Northrop for a couple of months. (*****)
I love when I hear good news!
Thursday, February 17, 2005 at 14:18:48 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I've been trying to help Skip. I'm driving him to San Fransisco. The drive alone will cost me $200.
Skip's giving away his good stuff to people he's barey met.
I gave him clothes because he barely had any. He's trying to sell them.
He want's me to store his other stuff, meaning I couldn't sell or trash it.
He's giving stuff to a barber that cut his hair yesterday.
He asked, and I said he could, give away the Palm V that he gave to us.
Meanwhile, he owes me well over $1,000.
I explained this to him:
Instead of giving stuff away that may have value, he should leave it here. Maybe I could sell it and recover some of the back rent that he owes me. He agreed then called Rehab long distance and asked them if they wanted some manuals.
Rehab asked him if he had $100 to bring. He'll undoubtedly ask me to loan it to him. Sheesh. I'd bet he's not even going to clean his room.
None of this is right:
When a person lives under your roof for a year, and they grab your change, cigarettes and owe you rent, shouldn't they at least try if they can to square things up.
Skip's going to keep asking for favors until I put his stuff out on the sidewalk and tell him to go to hell.
Skip was offered a job yesterday, as a security guard at Sportsmans.
He turned it down. He'd rather go to San Fransisco and be a bum.
I would have talked him out of it, but, if I did, he'd be staying here and this house would smell like Old GrandDad again.
Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 20:47:26 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Oh my...Skip asked me if he could park my truck in the driveway.
I said, naw that's okay. Then he asked me why I don't let him drive my truck. I told him the last time I did, the paint was scratched all the way down the side.
He got pissed, but hey, its the only vehicle I own, it's paid off and it's pretty nice. What can I say?
Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 20:34:37 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Faith Healers, Religion, Ghosts - What makes sense? Multiple Choice Questions
1. When a crippled person is touched by a faith healer on TV, and gets up from his wheelchair and walks...
a) He is probably an actor who could walk before the faith healer touched him.
b) The faith healer probably transmitted Gods power through his hands.
c) He probably couldn't walk, because he didn't want too, or was afraid too.
d) The evangalist probably heals people on Television, because hospitals won't spread God's Word.
2. A man says God commands people through him...
a) The man is probably a con-artist who wants people to do something for him.
b) God probably only talks to him, and people should do whatever he says.
c) God probably can't talk to everyone because he has limited powers.
d) The man is probably special because he's believes in the Bible and prays more than everybody else.
3. Moses says God is going to write on stone tablets on a mountain, and anyone that trying to watch, must be killed.
a) Moses is actually writing the tablets and doesn't want to get caught.
b) God is probably so bashfull when he writes, he has people killed that try to watch.
c) God will only write on tablets in front of Moses.
d) God gets nervous when chiselling stone, and thats why Moses had to smash the first tablets.
4. The Bible was first written in:
a) English and Greek
b) Hebrew and Ceryllic
c) Hebrew and Latin
d) English and Latin
5. Easter got its name from...
a) The Latin Name for the Rising of Christ
b) The Roman Catholic word Easter, meaning the rising of Christ
c) Estra, the Pagan God of fertility, who's symbols were the hare and the egg.
d) The Roman Catholic Pope - Saint Easter
6. There are 40 days of Lent, instead of the actual 46 because...
a) 40 is everywhere else in the Bible
b) Sundays weren't counted because of the nested holidays
c) The Pope changed the calendar in the 1600's. February used to have 22 days in it.
d) Saturday didn't exist in Christ's time.
7. Psychics can see your future because...
a) They meditate alone for hours
b) People will pay for, and listen to, anything they have to say
c) They are the offspring of a psychic.
d) They can't predict the future for themselves (EG: Predict the lotto number)
8. Few people have seen ghosts because...
a) Those that have, are insane.
b) Ghost get lost easily.
c) They hang out in Salem, Massachusetts
d) They exist only when we are looking for, or are frightened of them.
9. Praying must be done on your knees, with your hands cupped because...
a) Cupped hands act like a transmitter to God.
b) It looks cool.
c) We should make it easier for God's representative to cut off our head if he wishes.
d) We are lowly sinners, and showed bow to God, our creator.
10. Catholic Priest speak in Latin because...
a) God is too stupid to learn English.
b) Few people on this planet speak Latin and it sounds holy.
c) He's saying the equivalent of a witches chant.
d) Latin is God's chosen language. It is better than any other language.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 00:43:05 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Joy was over, talking about this sorcorer friend who could shoot fire out of his hand. Well, I can do that...it's a simple trick!
I'm sure this friend couldn't do that because he sounded like a low life lier BUT!!! Way back when I was 12, I studied magic and learned about Flash Paper. You could easily order it back in the 60's. Matter of fact, bookies would use it to write there bets on. If they thought they were going to get busted, they'd light it up, and it would disappear with any ashes.
BTW-That was back in the days of The AMAZING KRESKIN, and several other, um, psychic magicians. Has anyone ever heard of Edgar Caycee? LOL
Flash Paper
Mix 5 parts nitric acid, 4 parts sulfuric acid. Place a piece of toilet paper on a dish. Soak for 10 minutes. Allow to dry.
It is stronger than normal tissue, and has a gel-like texture.
When lit, it burns before hitting the ground.
Note:
You are making nitrocellulose, also known as "celluloid." Basically, sugars, such as the cellulose that makes up paper, are appended with hydroxyl (OH) groups. The nitric-sulfuric acid mixture is a nitrating agent, converting the hydroxyl groups to nitrate esters (ONO2). This nitrocellulose now basically contains its own oxidizing agent. The same reaction occurs to make nitroglycerine from glycerol.
What I'm not going to say is how or where to get nitric acid
Flash paper is used by magicians for their pyrotechnic effects and is very dangerous, If someone uses it to, say, shoot flames out his nose, well, he's just an idiot. Also, nitric acid is extremely toxic.
Flash paper is probably best purchased over the internet along with flash paper shooters.
You can make flash shooters with kitchen match heads too, and its much safer!
Pop Rocks
Mix iodine crystals in ammonia until the iodine crystals well. Drain. Wrap in cig papers.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 18:16:27 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ever have one of those lives where nothing you do or say makes a difference?
Almost everything I've said today has been interrupted or ignored.
- I told Skip cirrhosis of the liver is not a disability, unless it keeps you from gainful employment.
He says yes it is. He thinks he can get Disability, unemployment and work all at the same time. hmmm. He was let go a year ago and hasn't worked since.
- I told Skip he needs his Garage Sale signs to be more visible. Red on a white background is always nice. It's going to rain tommorrow for his sale. Anyway, he goes out and gets wrapping paper from the 99c store. He was going to write on the back of it and put it out in the rain. The paper he got was transparent. hmmm.
Anyway, I told him that the rule of thumb was to have signs that are visible a half block away, that way people can slow down for the turn.
He said yea I know that, like I am stupid.
- I was telling Becky what we'd have to do to start a janitorial business. I got 2 sentences out and she started yelling at Squirt for chewing on a pen outside. I went out and got the pen. Then I came back, and Skip was talking about his yard sale. I gave up, planning is very important, but I won't fight to do it.
- I'd like to say because my corp is gone, and I can't refinance the house again at a decent rate, because I've lost my source for "Stated Income", but, noone would listen.
I'd feel like I'm all alone in a world of people that don't know the difference between a wall and a door.
We just got back from Walmart
Skip's been driving me nuts with his Garage Sale Sign crap.
I picked up some bright Garage Sale Signs for $.80 a piece, plus 2 HUGE SIGNS for $1.90. No Big Deal!
No more arguments about his cardboard boxes with garage sale written on it with a ball point pen...PHEWWWW!
Ya see, when we left, Skip brought a piece of plywood home, 2' x 4' with nails in it. And its under the carport right now.
ALL I WANT IS PEACE!!!
I don't want shopping carts or plywood with nails in it under my carport. I don't want solicitors calling me, or people walking in without knocking. I don't want people doing drug deals over here, or climbing in through cracked windows. And I don't want people coming in, grabbing a roll of paper towels and throwing in their car.
Renting rooms has worked out terribly
Besides not getting paid, besides the extra $100 a month incidentals, besides the higher utility bills, its gone from someone helping me, to me help someone.
SKIP IS THE LAST MAN I'LL EVER SUPPORT!!!
Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 15:25:04 (PST) <Mike (Squirty's alter-ego)>
Valentine's Day
Gee, all I did was buy my right hand a dozen roses and a box of chocolates, and it was happy. Just Jive Talk from a puppy doggy alter-ego... Tres-Cinco. Jim and Rebecca know what that means, but it's a secret to everybody else. So there!! Tell me it ain't so, about Cutlar Enterprises.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 08:19:54 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Well, that's an interesting point of view Joy. VD is about love and not what you've recieved.
I got Becky Black Cohosh and a wallet for VD.
Sonny, Becky and I went to The Hush Puppy last night (****+).
They had yummy fish food. I tried their 'All you can eat crab legs' and to my surprise, the crab legs actually had meat in them! The place was packed too! Sonny got the 'all you can eat catfish' (****), and Becky tried the 'Seafood Platter' (*).
While talking to Sonny last night, I realized I know his High School teachers names, but not mine
I guess that's not that surprising. I slept or ditched most of my High School classes. I was smart about it though, I always showed up to Home Room class.
The Hammer of Common Sense
Ever hear someone talking winning $1,000,000 and then for an hour, they talk about what they're going to do with the money. I get that a lot around here.
Skip was talking about getting on disability because he's got cirrhosis of the liver, and how he may be able to get unemployment because of it too, but that he was going to work anyway. I told Skip that he may have to amplify one of cirrhosis's symptoms to get on disability. He said the symptom he's got is cirrhosis. I asked him if he feels bad because of it and he said "No, I feel great!"
About then, I wanted to hit him with The Hammer of Common Sense. You can't get on disability in the first place unless you have an impairment that keeps you from working.
Monday, February 14, 2005 at 20:29:52 (PST) <Joy>
Valintinesday
I dont get what is the big deal about reciving gifts on valintinesday isnt valintines day suosed to be about love and not gifts i mean if you think about it how many guys get in trouble beacuse they didnt get there girlfreind the right gift or couldnt get one for them i mean its stupid isnt it it should be about the person you love and not just about the gifts. so anyone who thinks its just about the gifts needs to lighten up
Monday, February 14, 2005 at 17:16:37 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
CUTLAR ENTERPRISES IS DEAD!!!
That's what I found out today at the Nevada Business License Department. It's been dead since July 2003. My CPA talked me into keeping the Corporation in September 2004. But he hadn't filed my corporate papers like he should have. It's a simple document that list the Corporations Officers. And, he didn't forward the mail for my business license renewal. $300 a year is what I pay him. I should get a refund.
So he's fired. He didn't do his job.. It cost me $500 or abouts to incorporate. It took months of effort. And it took $10,000 to open a Corporate Checking account. All that is wasted. History.
I might be able to pick up the pieces but it'll take some time. I wasted 2 hours at the License Department today, just to find out I needed to refile my Corp papers.
Monday, February 14, 2005 at 17:09:01 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
It's funny, I talked to Allen today
And I showed him a copy of his Instant Message. He didn't remember saying those things. It's all cool though. Just as long as bs.
I recorded my Mom babbling when she was drunk a long time ago. It was back in the 70's. She told me after hearing herself, she quit drinking. It's amazing what A Cold Slap of Reality Right In The Face will do to someone. har har!
Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:37:13 (PST) <Mike (Squirty's alter-ego)>
Long live Jimmy and his BLOG
Jimmy... Glad I was cool for a change. My ex-cube mate at Northrop said all I was, was a "Cracker". Or a "Honkie". Depending on what mood he was in. Personally, I didn't mind his calling me a "Jive Turkey", but those others were a bit too harsh. There are much worse than being a Cracker, a Honkie, or even a Jive Turkey. A bigot for example. But if all Allan is, are words, then we don't have much to worry about. If he acs upon his hatred, then he's bad. Real bad. Words rarely hurt. Or they shouldn't anyway. I get a kick out of how the current flock of over paid, over pampered pro athletes go blastic over words or looks. They should have seen how great men like Jackie Robinson and Hank Aaron dealt with really hateful behavior in their day. Being banned from restaurants and hotels, death threats to them and their families, and so forth. Just for being black and wanting to play baseball. Look at the Indiana Pacers and Detroit Pistons players going to beat someone up for looking at them the wrong way. Really. My regards to Ms. Rebecca (Grandma)... Til later.
Monday, February 14, 2005 at 10:54:25 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Statistics of Languages spoken worldwide - from your friendly CIA people
The CIA's 2000 World Language Estimates
14.37% - Chinese, Mandarin, 06.02% - Hindi, 05.61% - English, 05.59% - Spanish, 03.40% - Bengali, 02.63% - Portuguese, 02.75% - Russian, 02.06% - Japanese, 01.64% - German, 01.28% - Korean, 01.27% - French, 53.38% - Other
The United States Language Estimates
85.01% - English, 11.09% - Spanish, 00.80% - Chinese, 00.65% - French, 00.55% - German, 00.48% - Tagalog (Philippines), 00.40% - Vietnamese, 00.40% - Italian, 00.35% - Korean, 00.28% - Russian
Totals are based on a US population of 253,416,575

Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 19:14:00 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Nice day today. Weather was perfect!
We all visited Sandy Ficus, Jessy and Ryan today. It was a packed house (or trailer) over there. Steve Ficus (her ex hubby, which most people here slightly hate), is in jail in Arizona, finally. Jessy, Ryan, Sandy and her new boyfriend Jim, all seem to be doing great. Jessy (who's grown a foot and is Dustins age) has surprisingly matured a bunch. I love it when people get their lives together.
A neighbor bought some of Skips stuff for $30
Skip has been a pain, and I think he bought himself some hot sauce. I want Allen and Skip to serve as a lesson for the next time I want to get loaded. Skip confessed some things over spaghetti tonight that I had no idea he was capable of. This could be a long, rough two weeks.
Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 11:11:46 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
The future of avionics...the "Hair Plane". This principle is based on antigravity and morning hair.
Robert got up this morning and his hair (like mine) was sticking straight up in the air! Now, I pondered on this every day occurance and I wondered why hair goes straight up in the morning, I can't even blow dry my hair that way. The best hairspray won't keep my hair standing straight up. So, I thought about pillows.
I know if you stroke a nail with something metal it will magnetise it. I'm thinking something like this must be happening with hair and pillows! Rubbing hair with a pillow must make it lighter than air.
Heres my invention - The "Hair Plane"
Take an old record player and a record covered with hair. Put it on the record player at high speed. Place a pillow over it in a static position and Voila! You've created your first flying saucer!
Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 10:56:07 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
"Imagine" by John Lennon, September 1971
Imagine there's no heaven, it's easy if you try, no hell below us, above us only sky.
Imagine all the people living for today...
Imagine there's no countries, it isnt hard to do, nothing to kill or die for, and no religion too.
Imagine all the people living life in peace...
Imagine no possesions, I wonder if you can, no greed or hunger, A brotherhood of man.
Imagine all the people sharing all the world...
You may say Im a dreamer, but I'm not the only one,
I hope some day you'll join us, and the world will live as one.


These words changed my way of thinking back in the early 70's. I bought this 8 track tape and listened to it 1,000 times. Back then, the world was a place of needless suffering, slaughter, and people's rights were trampled. Students were shot protesting a war that couldn't be won. America was at war with itself.
I wonder what people will think of this 2005 30 years from now?
What we do today matters. ** smiles **
Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 10:25:13 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Kewl entry Mike. YEA MIKEY!!!
You've got a cool nature dude. I was getting ready to delete what I wrote about Allen and saw your entry. My entry stands. I was pissed at Allen. He was talking like Archie Bunker on Magic Mushrooms, but, shoot, that's the way he gets when he's blasted. I get more stupidder (lol). However, I usually avoid bigots.
Skip is doing his yard sale thing this morning
He sold his VCR, little TV, small vacuum and some other things to Robert for $50. Robert's going to square up with Skip on Tuesday.
Skip said he's has to get rid of everything he has except for 2 suitcases.
I had to ask him why. He said he's going straight into Rehab when he goes to San Fransisco and that's all they'll let him bring in. WOW. I wonder if I could ever do something like that, own nothing but the clothes in my suitcase. I'd have to get established somewhere first. Skip has been trying to get his VCR working with his TV. He cracks me up!
I should check on what he's selling out there. He tends to forget where he gets things from.
Robert, Joy, Amy and Becky are all sleeping blissfully.
He's broke, on empty, and is almost out of baby formula. He won't take any money from us, so we slipped $20 in his baby formula can, lol.
Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 07:32:59 (PST) <Mike (Squirty's alter-ego)>
Long live Jimmy and Ms. Rebecca
So Jimmy... Nice remarks from Allen. Yes, San Francisco does have a much higher percentage of gays and lesbians than most cities. And even the straight people seem gay to an extent, but like you said... SO WHAT??? As long as they live their lives and you are free to live yours, what is the big deal? The politics of the town do seem odd. The mayor of SF aking it upon himself to marry all those same sex couples, making them happier than smeg, and the state of California DA (rightfully or not) and voiding the marriages. As far as Skip is concerned, where is he going? What happened? Junk yard? Gee, that reminds me of my days as a junk yard dog.. You think Squirty is too naive to be a junk yard dog? Well, in my past life, I was a cow (wearing a padded bra by the way). But in the life before that, I was a doberman pincher and tell you, I was one mean dog!!!
Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 00:32:39 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Life sure has its dark moments, doesn't it?
Skip is moving out after a year here. That'll be good for him. For me though, it states failure. All efforts to improve our lives have been our waist.
I talked to Allen tonight.
What a mistake! He said San Fransisco is gay, asked me if I am gay, and said iRobot is a nigger movie. Way to go Allen! With just a few short comments you've bashed one of America's most beautiful cities, my favorite movie, and pretty much all of my black friends. I don't care what color people are, or what their sexual preferences are. My best friend growing up was Danny Cowan, he's gay, and really, I could care less. He's cool. (I really think he became that way after marrying my ex-girlfriend though).
Man, it's time to jump circles. Low quality people tend to share thoughts that far are below moral standards. Between David dealing drugs here last week, what Allen said tonight, and just being flat assed used by some, I need a new circle of pals. Things are going to change.
Becky and I are ready for good times!
Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 20:53:11 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Good Times. Becky's kids watched cartoons all day. Robert and I went to the dump...yea!
I love the dump! We were looking for a headlight for his truck. Found none. But, I love looking at old beaten up vehicles. We at pork roast and watched Teenage Ninja Turtles. kewl night!
Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 12:59:49 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Once again, no good deed goes unpunished!
Every once in a while, I bring Becky's kids over, and let them pick the movie rentals to watch. And, sometimes they go home, and tell Grandma about us for letting them watch bad movies and things.
These bad bad movies are:
"Harry Potter" - it has witches in it. Grandma believes witches exists.
"Troy" - It has historical value, but has violence in it.
"Spy Kids" - I don't know what's wrong with that one.
"Pokemon" - It's mindless, but she's flip flopped on it.
But, it's okay to watch:
Lord of the Rings I and II on Christmas day - Heads getting cut off with blood everywhere.
Power Rangers - They gangland style kill an ugly monster every episode and that's real nice.
Casper the Friendly Ghost - Even though its about dead people. lol.
Speaking about ghost, why are they frightening? If they killed you, wouldn't you be a ghost too. And if you were a ghost, couldn't you then kick their ass! LOL.
The logic of some people eludes me.
It's okay to dangle the symbol of a man dying with nails in his feet and hands hanging on a cross 2,005 years ago, because thats symbolic. I think that's sadistic.
However, its not okay to show how the great city of Troy (3,000 BC - 80 BC) fell.
So, in my defense, I told the kids they couldn't watch TV here, at all
Stories started flying around about how they said this and not that, and that the other one told. LOL. I finally let them rent some movies, but told them this is the last time I'd trust them. I'm 49, I think I'm a good man with good values, and I don't believe in fairy tales.
Hehe...we were putting Spy Kids II on, and I told them I should call Grandma just to make sure it met with her approval. They screamed...NOOOOOOOOOooooooo! har har.
About the crucifix thing and religious holidays!
Why do more religious holidays fall on a person's deathdate and not his birthdate? Take Valentines Day for instance, that's when St Valentine was killed!
And why do people wear ghastly death symbols around their necks?
Seriously, my Mom was a deacon in the Episcopalian Church and she thought the crucifix was a rather gaudy symbol. She taught me that it was sadism to worship an idol depicted dying in extreme pain. I still agree!
Mom once asked me "Jim, if I died while saving you from being hit by a speeding car, would you wear a necklace with a symbol of my bloody body dangling on car's hood, around your neck?".
Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 09:46:43 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Skip is being adament on having a garage sale tommorrow; come rain, sleet or snow!
Hmmm. LOL. His logic sometimes befuddles me! No signs, just his stuff under my carport on Gabriel Drive...the shortest street in Las Vegas. It's supposed to pour down rain tommorrow.
Skip's got brass, I'll give him that! Watch him surprise us all!
Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 08:58:49 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I finally fixed my website to work with Netscape this morning!
Browser differences are VERY annoying. The bug was absolutely stupid. Netscape and Internet Explored have their own ideas about our web surfing experiences. They want sites to be designed for them, so website designers have to put all kinds of clutter in their code. EG: if IE this, if NETSCAPE that!
It sux!
Oops. I didn't know my Business License had expired in December!
My accountant gets the bill, and I guess he's sluffing. I should let him go. He laid out the guidelines for me to pay my taxes. A few years ago, he said I owed $12,000. He said I did everything right. I'll never know where the mistake occured, but that surely hurt! I pay him for tax compliance. Being delinquent on taxes or licenses just isn't right.
Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 08:28:32 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Hey Robert, not to worry!
#1  Medical debts don't affect your credit that much.
I was told by TRW they are ignored by most lending institutions. I guess you're experience will show if that's right or wrong. At any rate, you don't want to file bankruptcy until you absolutely have to. They're not going to garnish your wages. Eventually they'll write it off. Just don't share your address or phone number with any collection agencies and you won't be bothered. GO UNLISTED my friend! Say you live with David Keiffer! LOL!
#2  I could no more kick Skip out than I could your Mom. He's family!
He mentioned that his San Fransisco buddy just got out of rehab. Skip wants to do that too and I'm all for what's best for him.
California has better social policies than Nevada.
Their unemployment and welfare benefits put Nevada's too shame!
Besides, Skip knows people in San Fransisco. He doesn't know anybody here. At the rate he's been going, he never will.
I would say that if Skip were to go back to San Fransisco and get a good job, it would make us all stronger.
Here, he's just bringing me down, while destroying what's left of his confidence.
If I go down, he's lost a fall back position. If he loses his confidence, he'll end up in despair. So, its logical for him to go.
Love ya and look forward to seeing you this weekend!
Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 00:05:01 (PST) <robert>
Hey Jim and Mom, how have you people been? hehe.
Well I have been busy driving a 2 ton truck. Wow, what a trip it is. I got used to the 2 ton but now, when I hop in my truck, I feel like a micromachine lol. Anyways I drove the big truck in the rain. It was fun hehe!
You know Ahern rentals started me out at $10 an hr training but after my 2 weeks of training on tying down equipment and loading it, I start out $12.50 an hr which is really good. Get this, I was told that in about 6 months I can get up to 3 more raises in my 6 month period.
I feel bad for Skip too but you have to do what you have to do.
I do wish him well, thats for sure.
Over here at the house, Joy and I haven't eaten any meals for 3 days.
Now everytime Joy and I get in the fridge they yell at us and threaten us about leaving. I hate my Grandma and Uncle. Everybody says they are so nice. Only if people only knew them outside their job. I just talked to a lawyer on claiming bankruptcy to take care of my medical bills I have over $30,000 dollars. That was for just a two weeks visit and 2 surgery's. It sux, but I have a daughter to raise and a family to take care of. I just wish I had enough money and time to get married. It is hard with all of the stuff that is going on here in this crappy house.
Well guys I love you and plan to come over this weekend. I am off this Saturday and Sunday.
I will call and come by. Love you all. bye bye.
Love Joy, Amy, and Robert
Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:48:41 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Oh jeese...even now, right at this very moment, Skip is frying potatoes on the stove, uncovered.
This shouldn't bother me. We do love cleaning grease off of the stove top and floor. I'm glad Skip doesn't read this blog. I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings. But sheesh. Sorry, I'm just venting.

Friday, February 11, 2005 at 10:00:37 (PST) < Squirty's alter-ego (Mike)>
A new day. A new Headache.
Still can't get those pending jobs to materialize. They all scramble to talk to me on the phone three weeks ago, and now they want to wait another couple of weeks to talk to me again.
Causing a fustrating Mikey.
Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:39:04 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Skip may be moving out soon!
A friend of his in San Fransisco called, and said he'd pay for Skip's trip if he wanted to come back there. I told Skip this morning that I'd give him a ride there if he decided to go. It's sad, but Skip's efforts to find work here have been futile. When he came here with less than $100, I knew it was going to be bad news for my wallet. It has been. I love Skip. Maybe in time, when I get set up better, I'll be able to help him through his golden years.
I had hoped renting out rooms would offset my expenses.
It should have, if people were more predictable with their money. I could have retired years ago, if it wasn't for my charitable nature. I know I can rent this house out and make $700 in the clear. I had hoped renting rooms would net over $800 a month. Things just haven't worked out that way. Instead of losing $500 a month, I'm losing $1,300 a month. I haven't even made enough to pay for the utilities. And I have the only transportation available here, which is a double damnit.
I laid into Skip last night, and I shouldn't have. I had to apologize.
He had pulled the mirror off of the bathroom door and put it in the laundry room. Its been on that door since 1999. He said the nails wouldn't hold it.
I BLEW UP! I grabbed the mirror and a hammer and nailed it back up in less than a minute. Since he's complained about it before, I just asked him why he didn't just fix it. He said he tried but it still fell off. hmmm. I apologized. I didn't understand.
We should be thankful for the comforts we have. A lot of people will never have them.
When Skip first got here, he was impressed by the ice dispenser on the refrigerator door. He didn't know or wasn't thinking when he put a metal cup in the microwave. Covering food in the microwave isn't a habit to him. Skip has lived in apartments all of his life.
For me, thats hard to imagine. I've owned property now for 27 years. I'm broke when I'm down to $40,000.
So, to the modern day vagabonds, and the people who chose renting over ownership, I salute you!
You have more faith in your survival abilities than I'll ever have. I could never leave town with only my clothes and $200 in my pocket.
To rely on friends or family for support has never been one of my options.
I'd choose death first, and that is the kind of thinking that makes people like me, Rob and Timmy, the weaker of our species.
I try to make business with family and friends a mutually rewarding experience. That's not always possible with many people though.
Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:14:35 (PST) <Squirty's alter-ego (Mike)>
Pending trip???
Jimmy... Taking Squirty on the trip, if you go? He can go around, at every stop, showing off Rebecca's clothing. He is a very proud puppy dog, you know!!! All the job opportunities I had working have come to a screeching halt. With any luck, they'll get going again within a week.
Meanwhile, I play my horn on the street after a day of eating corn in order to view porn.
Sorry about that Ms. Rebecca...
Hope to talk to you soon, buddy..
Mikey
Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:14:35 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I kant spel werth a snitt
I just ran a spell checker on this blog. Phewwww!
Why is it that if you lie to someone, you are lying, or have lied
And if you lye down, you are also lying down, laying down or have been lain down?
English is a CRAZY language.
Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:14:40 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Mexico and its borders - The magic of numbers
A man was bringing Valium across the border for his wife's prescription. A girl warned him about the amount he was bringing across and said she would take it through customs for $150. He refused because he's never had a problem before. The man was being watched by the undercover Federallies. He was arrested, and thrown in jail without trial. Political pressure got him released 10 months later (his brother-in-law posted and distributed pamphlets on the US side warning people about Mexican business).
The following is from the Custom's Border Patrol website.
"If a U.S. resident wants to bring in a controlled substance (other than narcotics such as marijuana, cocaine, heroin, or LSD) but does not have a prescription for the substance issued by a U.S.-licensed practitioner (e.g., physician, dentist, etc.) who is registered with, and authorized by, the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) to prescribe the medication, the individual may not import more than 50 dosage units of the medication into the United States."
The way I read that is you can legally transport in 50 doses or less of a prescription drug, without a prescription, if it is for your own personal use..
However, Mexican laws apply too, and from what I've read, their policies change every day.
Bottom line is, order your medications through the internet! At least in the US, you're innocent before proven guilty.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 17:27:31 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
My Dad is dying...AGAIN. He doesn't read this blog BTW. lol.
He's always been convinced he's going to die soon. My Dad, the Placebo Warehouseman, asked Sonny to get his car, violin and computer because he's expecting the big one anytime now. Dad is 81 years old and lives 3,100 miles away. All of his life he's done his best to keep Merk, Johnson & Johnson, and Roche in business. I'd think his whole body would be pickled by now. By the time I was 3,000 days old, he'd already had 3,000 heart attacks!
If it weren't for Dad:
- I would never have even heard of a retina detaching.
- I never would have seen someone pull a needle through their arm saying it's numb.
- I would never have learned about the many wondrous forms of cancer
Did you know that heart attack victims have no advance warning signs?
Matter of fact, many heart attacks happen while on the toilet!
Those people obviously never had a clue they wouldn't finish their mission.
Ever heard of anyone's last requests written on toilet paper?
Dad's one of those guys who bought 500lbs of soy beans and rice for Y2K.
He was so convinced that the world was coming to an end, and while everyone else was dying, he'd be saying....SEE...I TOLD YOU! Never mind that his son (me) was a 17 year veteran of computer programming who said very little was going to happen. Never mind that I told him that I could change thousands of lines of code with one command, He listened to the doomsayers that said anyone who didn't have their literature (and rice and beans) we were all going straight to HELL! lol
I love my Dad. He's a very lovable nut!
Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 14:10:17 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I, am probably the dumbest person on the planet!
I've been feeling crappy, like I have the flu. I've been taking allergy pills for a long time. I like to take 2 Aspirin PM's before bedtime. When I've got the flu, sometimes I take Nyquil. WELL NOW, when I've done this, I've consumed triple the maximum dosage of diphenhydramine hydrochloride. All three products have the same active ingredient. I've been inadvertently overdosing on an over the counter remedy. All of my symptoms match.
Well, now that I know how stupid I've been, I should be up to 100% in a day or so.
sheesh.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 21:09:35 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon spill was $80,000
At a special ceremony, two seals were released back into the wild.
Cheers and applause came from the onlookers.
A minute later a killer whale ate them both.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 21:05:41 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Having a bad day?
Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 20:29:10 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Today is Mardi Gras and there's a party going on in my head!
Seriously, I don't know what I've got here, but I'm borderline insane from these flu-like symptoms.
Speaking about borderline insane, Jeanette in California called me this morning and asked me if I just called her. I said no, and we talked for an hour. In the background I could hear what sounded like an insane asylum. She let a girl, her boyfriend and a baby stay in her apartment. Now she can't get them out. It was funny. She'd say, "I can't believe it, she's cleaning up her mess", and there'd be some screechy unintelligible retort in the background. I had a good laugh. Thanks Jeanette.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 20:19:05 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Another day of feeling like crap!
I was reading about an Indian Tribe near Wyoming whose rituals regarding the elderly were somewhat unique. When an elder became too old to be useful to the tribe, they'd have a big celebration, a party, and at the end, they'd smash his head in with a rock. I'm glad we live in times like this!
Monday, February 07, 2005 at 10:00:34 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Speaking about drugs, lol
Our slightly illegal pharmacist called us to this morning ask us if we were satisfied with their service. If I answered the phone I would have said "HELL YEA!".
In November, I ordered 10 Albuterol inhalers at $10 each on the net for Becky.
They provided a prescription for her and we received the order in two weeks!
Some people would say, I wouldn't trust it, it's not safe. To them I'd say HUEY!
It's exactly the same stuff Becky used to get in the US for $80 an inhaler (medicare paid for 100% of it though so she didn't care).
The internet pharmacies offer incredible service
They'll sell you virtually anything. Even customs will let you bring pharmaceuticals in from Mexico if it is for your own personal use
I buy on the net for two reasons: Price and Privacy
Doctor/Patient privilege is protected but the pharmaceuticals that insurance companies pay for are not.
I had a seizure in 1998. I went to a hospital and told the Doctor that I was going through alcohol withdrawals (a hangover). He asked if I were an alcoholic and I said yes. BTW: The diagnosis of an alcohol sticks for the rest of your life. It never goes away even if you don't drink anymore.
I had to tell the doctor I was an alcoholic because he was going to diagnose me as a epileptic. If I were diagnosed as an epileptic, I would have lost my drivers license for three months. Rob lost his license by not saying he was an alcoholic.

Playing the game fairly only cost you. My only recourse now, is to go on disability or work and apply for group health insurance. HIPAA says I may have to wait anywhere from 12 to 18 months. Sweet, huh.
Health Insurance and carpal tunnel syndrome is the real reason I'm not consulting today.
I did the math. My health insurance went up to $650 a month with a $5,000 deductible. It was going up $50 every 6 months. I applied to 11 other insurance companies. The all knew about that seizure in 1998. They all denied coverage. Meanwhile, my left hand and arm were either hurting or numb. I had to get away from computers. Carpal Tunnel Syndrome is not a disability.
The HIPAA laws enacted in 1996 have never helped me.
Seemingly knowledgeable people tell me that HIPAA should protect me.
That is just not true. I've tried everything on insurance applications: Telling the truth, lying, taking alcohol and drug tests, you name it. Most of the insurance adjusters require that you sign a release form. They all see what prescriptions you've paid for (some how). I know, because they've seen my medical history because it slips out in the interviews. That sucks.
When I was covered by insurance, every time I went to the doctors, they prescribed Antibiotics
Every time! Ampicillin cost $80 for 20 tablets at a pharmacist. I pay $16 with insurance. However, in Mexico or over the internet, I can get a bottle of 100 Ampicillin tablets for $20. What is the best way to go?
To me, US Doctors are drug dealers who talk to you for 1 minute and write a prescription.
I guess they figure you'll come back if the prescription doesn't work. I spend much more time than that reviewing my symptoms.
I went to a clinic with flu-like symptoms. My triglyceride levels were off the chart The doctor mentioned my triglyceride level, and asked me "Doesn't that make you feel terrible". I said "Yes". He prescribed antibiotics! I have all of the papers here in my files. It's incredible. Antibiotics? Why did he order a blood test if he'd already decided on my prescription?
So, somebody tell me, after all that I've said here, is anyone receiving quality health care in the United States?
Sunday, February 06, 2005 at 22:59:38 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
In my rather spotty past, when someone did a drug deal at my house, I got part of the cut.
Of coarse, those days were fifteen+ years ago, but sharing was considered a common dealer courteously. It was like a code, a sort of like an underground etiquette. Things change though. I assume people still stomp on what they sell until it's pure baking soda. Well, all I can say is, I'm glad those days have come and gone.
And I'm glad that the only times I've ever been threatened with gun was:
- Once when my last ex (Ruth) got drunk Ruth shot the gun, the bullet went through the couch...and from there, who knows where it went.
- Once by my first ex's (Lisa's) married lover. I had left a note on his door telling him to keep away (his wife was 8 months pregnant at the time). He saw me leaving, followed me, then I pulled over, hopped in his truck. When he aimed the gun at my head, I told him that I didn't give a damn. He could shoot me and rot in jail while his kid grows up. What a pig! I told him stay away from my wife and I'll stay from yours.
Those two were really something. She'd have sex with me on the same days she'd have sex with him. On those days, Lisa would get ecstatic with me. That is how I guessed that she was having an affair (two affairs actually).
If your lucky to find a decent love that can last, hold on to it. It's hard out there.
It sure can be an ugly world when you remember back to the dark times.
My ex's were good people, in spite of their actions.
Sometimes wonder if my ex's never loved me at all. I feel like i was just the vehicle they used to get where they were going.
Both ex's I'll always love with most of my heart.

Sunday, February 06, 2005 at 22:04:03 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Robert, Joy, and Amy came over.
We had a LOT of fun. Robert beat Becky and I in the second game of Double Cross! Kewl! Robert turned me on to some fun websites which was cool. We had pizza! David came by later with some snacks. He came in and fell asleep on the couch. Then he used the phone and Lyle came over. They did a frig'n drug deal in the backyard and I really don't appreciate that at all! sheesh.
Sunday, February 06, 2005 at 19:42:58 (PST) <robert>
New England Wins yahoo
Yahoo!!! I am happy I have bet on the last 6 super bowls and won. Wow, I guess Ii should go into sports betting lol. But knowing my luck I would lose if I tried lol. But it was great watching the bowl at Jim's. I paid for a pizza and so did Jim. He didn't have to, but Jim is a generous guy and wanted to pitch in. I played Mom and Jim at Double Cross and won for the first time too. Yahoo!!! I guess its my lucky night. Since I am that lucky I think I'm going to go home and get laid hahaha!!! Well, love ya all! bye bye
Sunday, February 06, 2005 at 13:32:02 (PST) <becky>
Good morning America! Today is Super Bowl Sunday!
I really don't care for football myself. My son Robert and his g/f are coming over to watch it today. Yippee yahoo huh LOL!!!
Jim I read your blog today about the different religions.
It was very interesting about the Pagan's. Well you know me...I don't understand some things that I read. I do believe that there is a God though. I'm not good at writing. This is the best i can do. Love you Jim(kisses)
Sunday, February 06, 2005 at 13:31:50 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Happy Super Bowl Sunday!
Robert, Joy and little Amy are coming over to celebrate. It should be a fun day.
I started taking Ampicillin (from Mexico) again.
I feel one heck of a lot better than I did yesterday, and yesterday, I got all banged up in the snow. Health, by itself, is a good reason to celebrate.
Allen Harmon called this morning
Allen has always been a brother to me. He called just to make sure everything was alright. If I knew Allen were in trouble, I wouldn't hesitate on driving 2,100 miles across the country to help him out. Allen and I haven't touched a drink now for 2 weeks. So, it's fun to talk to him about the altered state of sobriety...lol
I haven't been on MSN Messenger for awhile.
I've been busy "conceptualizing" my old age, and how I'm going to plan my retirement. I've been researching business operations. That's the only way I can see living comfortably to the age of 70. And if that is the best way to go, then that's the way I'm going.
Sunday, February 06, 2005 at 11:02:13 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Welcome Christian Stranger
I changed your entry from all upper case to case sensitive. It's interesting what you wrote.
I like the Bible, but they've rewritten it so many times. It's still hard to read their translation from Hebrew to English. Just try translating Hebrew to say, Chinese. How good would it come out? But at the very least, isn't it possible for a reader to translate that old English into to modern day English.
You wrote: The savior Jesus Christ himself asks, what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his soul?
This sentence says Jesus Christ "the savior".
It's nice how that was just slipped in there. That just angers a lot of people.
Most of the worlds people don't belong to "Club Jesus"!
I want to dissect that sentence for the heck of it, if that's okay.
What will a man profit if he gains the world?
I'd think he'd gain power. Isn't that what we all want in some way?
I'd doubt if any single man could control the world anyway though. To do so, he'd have to have a team and they'd have to have teams and so on.
Currently, President Bush seems to be the closest to being a world leader. Does that mean he lost his soul getting there? hmmm. Who am I to judge? Just 1 in 8 billion.
What does that mean, losing your soul?
Well now, from everything that I've read, the soul is the controlling part of an intellectual being.
Aristotle wrote of faculties (the reason we are here):
- All plants have nutritive faculties
- All animals have perceptive and nutritive faculties
- All humans have intellect, perceptive and nutritive faculties
Doesn't that statement kind about humans seem kind of vain? People seem to be that way. We're only a little bit smarter than chimpanzees and dogs.
From what I've seen, all animals have some kind of special talent. We seem to be gifted with conceptuality.
Even beavers have the ability to conceive. The look at a stream, imaging a stick dam there, then build it. That's all that they need.
My question is: What is a soul? Is it something we imagined that can be lost or saved based on how good or evil we are?
If I were to give an uneducated answer, I would say the a soul is a description of how an entity differs from the other entities in its species. It can't go beyond our species.
For example: its okay for us to kill any other species, that's acceptable. That doesn't make us evil.
It's not okay for us to kill our own species. That makes us evil, unless our God said it was okay.
If another life form evolved that were more powerful than us, would it be evil for them to kill us?
By religious examples, Yes and No. According to how we've written the Bible, they would be evil to us, but not to themselves.
It's okay for God and and his followers to strike down the sinners.
Since people believe that God only speaks to a chosen few, and we're supposed to follow those few, those few can say anything they want.
Christians can only pray our that people from other planets will believe that Jesus is their savior or that the Israelites are the chosen ones. I'd think that would be a very hard sale, if not totally absurd.
I don't buy into "Club Jesus".
Power, for us, seems to be in our numbers.
If 90% of the population were Christians, they could say the world is flat.
10% of the people would have to go along with the world being flat or die.
Anyone who said the world was round would be a sinner and ripe for a Godly killing.
According to: Adherents.com the consensus is:
Christianity: 2 billion, Islam: 1.3 billion, Hinduism: 900 million, Secular/Nonreligious/Agnostic/Atheist: 850 million, Buddhism: 360 million, Chinese traditional religion: 225 million, primal-indigenous: 150 million African Traditional & Diasporic: 95 million, Sikhism: 23 million, Juche: 19 million, Spiritism: 14 million, Judaism: 14 million, Baha'i: 6 million, Jainism: 4 million, Shinto: 4 million, Cao Dai: 3 million, Tenrikyo: 2.4 million, Neo-Paganism: 1 million, Unitarian-Universalism: 800 thousand, Rastafarianism: 700 thousand, Scientology: 600 thousand, Zoroastrianism: 150 thousand.
Notice the Pagan's are rather low in count. I've read they were slaughtered by the Catholics. That's sad.
How many times do people have to see history repeat itself, before they learn how to change it.
Religious wars are happening today!
Saying things like "The savior Jesus Christ himself asks, what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his soul?" just feeds the fire. You people are claiming God for yourselves.
I've hated reading about how most of our holidays were recreations of holidays of a people that were slaughtered: Thanksgiving, Easter, Valentines Day, Halloween. If you knew that Valentines Day represents a holiday stolen from the Pagans after they were slaughtered, wouldn't you think its an evil holiday. I do, but I'll still celebrate it.
I like some of the Christians beliefs. However, I've seen some Christians in action that just go through life destroying and hurting other people. They seem to want to save you and make you like their pitiful selves, even if it kills you. Or they want to bum off of you in the name of God.
These people give 5% to token causes and keep the rest. Or am I the only one that sees that?
That is not the "Do Unto Others as You Would Have Them Do Unto You" rule.
That is the "Do Unto Others" rule which seems so popular in these times.
Me, I like to read about all of the religions.
The Pagan's seemed pretty cool in many aspects. We owe most of our holidays to them. Did they really have to be killed?
Did Americans Indians really have to called Pagan's to justify their slaughter?
The truth is out there!
Somewhere in all of the garbage found in Bible, there are some good values to keep and hold. That seems true with all of the worlds religions.
If you read any of this, you'd realize that the LAST thing anyone would want, is for a single religion to dominate the world and say it was flat.
We all should thank God for the diversity of religions. lol.
So REPENT_REPENT2005@YAHOO.FR alias "JESUS CHRIST IS LORD", I welcome your entries.
Where are you in France?
I should say you should tread lightly my friend, because most of the world does not believe the way your religion does.
- To most of the world, Jesus Christ is NOT the savior.
- They do not think they are going to hell just because you think they are.
- And they (we) are not fools either.
Please use upper and lower case in the entries if at all possible.
LOVE YA, KEEP BELEIVING...AND BE COOL.
I'm not trying to change anyone, I'm just expressing my opinion. And I hope your right about Jesus.
Just please don't ever say that anyone who doesn't believe in Christ is going to Hell and doesn't deserve to live.
Have you ever considered the possibility that nobody will be saved?
Does that frighten you? Does it frighten you that you were born from from death? Is what you see and experience so frightening to you?
Please tell me you've seen a ghost or something. I'd love to hear about that!
Sunday, February 06, 2005 at 05:57:53 (PST) <JESUS CHRIST IS LORD>
The savior Jesus Christ himself asks, what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his soul? mark-8-36.OR What shall a man give in exchange for his soul?-matt-16-26. You have the right to not share my gospel of God'S kingdom, but you are without excuse to give God.It is not a question of church membership, or of living a good life, but this have you been born adin by accepting Jesus Christ as your personal savior? If you haven't done this, you are lost and need to take advantage of God's offer to save you. and you need to do it now! Will you stop right now and receive Jesus Christ as your personal savior? If you do, you will be prepared to meet God, and you will find that sweet peace which only God can give. Could there possibly be any reason to delay? God says,come to me. Hear and your soul shall live,and I will make an everlasting covenant with you.isa-55-3.Please, do it today. JESUS CHRIST IS LORD.
Saturday, February 05, 2005 at 21:12:06 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
We took Dustin and Jennifer sledding today
Mt Charleston is so pretty. I woke up feeling terrible today, but, who knows, maybe next week I'll feel worse. So, we went today.
Who'd ever thing that 40 minutes away from this desert, houses would be buried up the roof in snow. I climbed up a 40' hill that was very steep. 5' down, I lost my sled and rolled all the way down the hill. Pretty rough stuff. Dustin actually did the sled run too. He almost made it to the road, (at least 100'). Kewl...but he stopped and was laying back on the sled, with his finger sticking up. He said he scrapped it.
Now, there I am, hair everywhere with snow in it from my roll, covered with bruises, and he's holding up 1 finger and complaining. hmmm.
We had a lot of fun though.
Friday, February 04, 2005 at 21:39:26 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
One other thing. I heard what I said on this blog made someone angry.
Well, this blog is an open format. It's freedom of speech in it's greatest form.
Plus, there's not many people that read this Binary LOG. So, anything that is said here is just an exchange of thoughts whether good, bad, loving, or humourous. Sometimes a negative entry pops up.
Hey, I felt sick today. If anybody else feels crappy, it would be nice to know. It would be nice to know how other people relieve the symptoms wouldn't it?
More important I think, is that this thing keeps a daily record of life, people, their love, along with things and events that are happening around the world. It's what History is all about. HIS-STORY. Get it? hehehehe
Friday, February 04, 2005 at 21:14:03 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Once again Mikey, you made me laugh
I've seen dogs that could wear a bra though. MAN!, those dogs are hogs!
I tore the air conditioner apart today looking for a gas leak
That wasn't easy because the roofers who sprayed foam on my roof, sprayed it up higher than the access panels. I had to dig it out...!%#@%$^
I started feeling crappy again...don't know what's going on here
But, Becky feels crappy too...Misery Loves Company
Robert called and invited us to Macayo's
I feel kind-of guilty letting him buy. Robert's a great guy, and he's one of the very few people whose ever even thought about squaring things up with me. I LOVE THIS GUY. Macayo's was a lot of fun. I just wish I were feeling better.
We watched "Terminal" with Tom Hanks
There we are, Becky and I, sitting on the couch, smiling, with tears rolling down our faces. It was beautiful! I get chill bumps just thinking about it, or is that just the flu? LOL.
Friday, February 04, 2005 at 11:52:38 (PST) <Squirty's alter ego, aka: Mike>
I like showing off Rebecca's bras, as I don't have any of my own. If I did, I'd be proud of them instead. But, how many times have you heard of a puppy dog needing a bra? Now... When I was a cow in my previous life, that was another thing. Had to go to the vet today. Bruised my nose when that car I was chasing hit the brakes and I ran into the rear bumper. The doc says I'll be ok, but everything right now smells like a bumper.
Thursday, February 03, 2005 at 17:23:57 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Coincidence Is Amazing! What are the Odds?
I took Becky to DMV to renew her license today between 2:30pm and 3pm. I go to DMV maybe once every 8 years. There we are in line, we're the next number up, and I hear "JIM". Robert Spurling was there getting a DMV printout. Well, I loaned him $7 for the thing, checked out his wrecked truck. He said maybe they'll come up to the mountains with us Saturday. Friken astronomically way out there in odds!
Suppose we are here for some high purpose
Suppose we're not just the product of 8 billion years of mother natures failed experiment. Suppose 10 to the 10000 power reproduces another me, but with my nose upside down. Would the odds of that be any greater than us seeing Robert at the DMV today? BTW-That was cute Mike (Squirty)
If Squirt loves us so much...how come he drags Becky's padded bra's out to the back yard for the meter reader to see? HUH! lol
I've been reading up on starting a business.
Scroll down and you'll see how I calculated to equal Disability benefits today, I'd need $500,000 invested at 5%. Well, working for the man at $60,000 a year will not get me $500,000 in the next 13 years. The only possible way to retire decently (not getting breakfast out of a dumpster) is to start a business or have lots of children. I suppose I could still have lots of children, but Becky would be pissed.
Thursday, February 03, 2005 at 12:06:25 (PST) <Squirty>
Hi, I am a puppy dog, and I love making entries on Jim Cutlar's BLOG. Jim and Rebecca are great owners and I love them a lot. But Rebecca doesn't let me lick the roof of her mouth. How mean!!! Hope all is well with everybody out there in Arpanet land. BTW: In my previous life as a cow, I helped Al Gore design and build the Arpanet (nee: Internet). Those were the fun times. And not that long ago. In the early to mid 80s. And those darn Computer Science types claiming to laid the foundation of the Internet back in the late '60s and early '70s. How dare them!!! They are NERDS!! And nothing but NERDS!! Well, they're GEEKS too, but that's kinda the same thing. At least to a dog like me. Enough of my rants.. Time to go and chase speeding cars.. See ya..
Wednesday, February 02, 2005 at 22:35:02 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Oh yea, I lost my yesterdays entries on my new found energy
My experiment of turning the heat off for a couple of days paid off in spades. My eyesight is perfect. I up to 100% energy. My headaches have disappeared. I can think at light speed now.
Yesterday, I fixed a leak on the roof, we dusted, I cleaned the A/C ducts and filter, blew off the leaves on the front and back porch, cleaned windows, Chloroxed the water softener, backflushed it for an hour, added in 240lbs of salt, bought hairclamps at the 99c store. Becky vacuumed and helped out with everything.
Wednesday, February 02, 2005 at 22:21:55 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Upgraded my site for February
Yesterday, I went up on the roof and fixed a leak in my skylight. I checked the vent to the water heater and sure enough, the roofers covered it up with styrofoam. But the exhaust flow wasn't blocked. So, in an ongoing attempt to find out why this is a sick-house, today I purchased and installed a CO detector. It has a readout for ppm (parts per millionth) of Carbon Monoxide. Registering at 13 ppm, that's not enough to affect us. So, tommorrow, I'm going up on the roof to tear apart the A/C unit. I still think it might have a leak in its heat exchanger. That would definitely leak CO into the inside air.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005 at 13:45:58 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
The tree trimmers came over, David came over, and I still haven't worked on my A/C
Mike called this morning. He wants me to say he's my employee...no problem there.
David Keefer came over, made some calls. Said a guy he saw two days ago decided to throw away a box of stuff he was keeping. He's pissed.
Davy's Trees came over to trim tree limbs of the power lines. Well, I already trimmed the backyard trees 3 weeks ago due to my dumb neighbor's awning fence idea (he put fiberglass awning 10' tall along the fence to keep his dogs in...dumb). They shattered due to the wind, not my tree limbs. Anyway, I'd dragged all of my limbs together under the power lines (purely by chance). And Davy's Trees thanked the hell out of me for being so consciencous. lol.
While I was checking my spelling...I found a really cool website
Check it out: Anonalies Unlimited
This site is great if you like strange but true science.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005 at 13:26:08 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
So what's the way to go for retirement
Probably by going the all American route!
That is, to dream big! Start up a business.
I like these names for local businesses:
The Happy Housekeeper - A maid service
The Mad Scientist, Weird Science, Spacial Anomolies - A shop that sells science kits, toys and novelties
Weird Science - A shop that sells science kits, toys and novelties
Lawn Order - A lawn care company
Palm Brokers - A palm tree trimming service
Tree Hackers - A tree trimming service
Hairy Carry - A hair salon
Salon De Cheveux - A hair salon
For the stores, I'd think that one store front would be a bad bet.
The only way to cover all bases would be to finance the operation. That would take some research and networking. Financing the operation for any of these ideas would be the way to go though.
I like these names for web business
myAttic, myGarage, myJunk, myCloset - Merchant for miscellaneous house junk
myKnives - Swiss Army knives and such These are a few ideas.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005 at 11:49:36 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I'm still thinking about how retirement is going to work
Assuming I can save $20,000 a year (with luck) for the next 13 years
I'll have saved $260,000. $260,000 a year invested 5% = $13,000 a year.
Assume Social Security will still pay $600 a month = $7,200 a year
. I'd be retiring at 62 with $20,200 a year.
What's the bottom line here? I'll be living poor until retirement, and I'll be poor after retirement. Forget living in Hawaii on disability (see the previous entry), I'll be living in Paducah, Ky in the ghetto's, and I'll suffer there until I die 10 years later.
Man, that's not a pretty picture at all.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005 at 10:09:49 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Have you ever tried to plan your retirement? Think about disabilty.
Among the other things Sonny and I talked about was retirement planning.
I could wait for Social Security and get $800 when I'm 62, or $1,500 at 70.
But I know that I can receive $1,500 a month on disability now.
Lets do some math on that $1,500 disability!:
$1,500 a month x 12 = $18,000 a year.
Add on Food Stamps: $100 x 12 = $1,200 a year + $18,000 = $19,200 a year total.
I'd have to have invested $340,000 at 5% interest to equal a disabilty income of $19,000.
I'm not even going to mention taxation rules on disability.
But that's no all -- Medicaid kicks and the health insurance is free at a 0% deductable.
All health needs are free. I could go to the doctor to treat a cold!
Well, simply put, I can't get that period.
Insurance for me at 49 with preexisting conditions would cost $800 a month with a $5,000 deductable, and I pay 20% after the deductable is met.
In other words, $100,000 in health care would cost me $25,000.
For argument's sake, I'll use the $800 I would pay for crappy insurance. $800 x 12 = $9,600 a year.
I would have to have $192,000 a year invested at 5% to pay for crappier health insurance than Medicaide.
I should mention at this point, I can get Albuterol through the internet for $10 an inhaler. Through insurance, the pharmacist wants $80 an inhaler, so we in the United States have incredibly inflated prices on pharmaceutical goods.
$340,000 + $192,000 = $532,000
To equal the the benifits of those on disability I'd need $532,000 invested at 5%.
In other words, even when I was consulting making $140,000 a year, I never had a chance to retire early.
But I mentioned disability didn't I? How do you get that?
I know several people, one in Hawaii (ex-teacher,alcoholic), one in Sacramento (no occupation,panic attacks), that got on disability. You either get a social security lawyer or know the ropes, get a physicalogist referral, shift your assets if any, file the papers and BINGO, you've become the equivalent of a $500,000 retiree at 49. The girl in Hawaii gets free housing near the beach, and Hawaii even pays for auto insurance. Its not fair is it?
Now, a lot of people were raised not to think this way.
But who is smarter, the parents that taught their kids not to work the system and to work until their 70, or the people who are now working the system? Who had more free time to enjoy life?
Thu 
02/17/2005 12:02:01
 jim  Vegas,NV-Gabriel Becky
Tue 
02/15/2005 12:00:02
 jim  Vegas,NV-Gabriel Jim
Sat 
02/12/2005 12:00:02
 jim  Gabriel-Squirt Lips,Graphics
Sun 
02/06/2005 12:01:25
 jim  Superbowl-Jim,Amy,Robert,Joy,Becky
Sun 
02/06/2005 12:01:11
 jim  Superbowl-Jim,Becky,Robert,Joy,David
Sun 
02/06/2005 00:00:02
 jim  sleepover,NV-Robert,Joy,Amy,Jim,Becky
Sat 
02/05/2005 17:00:12
 jim  MtCharleston,NV-Dustin
Sat 
02/05/2005 15:50:02
 jim  MtCharleston,NV-Becky
Sat 
02/05/2005 15:00:33
 jim  MtCharleston,SledArea-JimBombing
Sat 
02/05/2005 15:00:08
 jim  MtCharleston-SledARea-Becky,Jim,Jen
Sat 
02/05/2005 12:00:01
 jim  MtCharleston,NV-DriveUp
Sat 
02/05/2005 00:00:01
 jim  Gabriel-Becky-HammergrinsHouse
Fri 
02/04/2005 00:00:14
 jim  Vegas,NV-NevadaPalace-Robert,Amy,Joy
Tue 
02/01/2005 23:01:37
 jim  January 2005
Tuesday, February 01, 2005 at 10:09:49 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Have you ever tried to plan your retirement? Think about disabilty.
Among the other things Sonny and I talked about was retirement planning.
I know that I can receive $1,500 a month on disability now.
Or I could wait for Social Security and get $800 at 62, or $1,500 at 70.
Lets do some math on that $1,500 disability!:
$1,500 a month x 12 = $18,000 a year.
Add on Food Stamps: $100 x 12 = $1,200 a year + $18,000 = $19,200 a year total.
I'd have to have invested $340,000 at 5% interest to equal a disabilty income of $19,000.
I'm not even going to mention taxation rules on disability.
But that's no all -- Medicaid kicks and the health insurance is free at a 0% deductable.
All health needs are free. I could go to the doctor to treat a cold!
Well, simply put, I can't get that period.
Insurance for me at 49 with preexisting conditions would cost $800 a month with a $5,000 deductable, and I pay 20% after the deductable is met.
In other words, $100,000 in health care would cost me $25,000.
For argument's sake, I'll use the $800 I would pay for crappy insurance. $800 x 12 = $9,600 a year.
I would have to have $192,000 a year invested at 5% to pay for crappier health insurance than Medicaide.
I should mention at this point, I can get Albuterol through the internet for $10 an inhaler. Through insurance, the pharmacist wants $80 an inhaler, so we in the United States have incredibly inflated prices on pharmaceutical goods.
$340,000 + $192,000 = $532,000
To equal the the benifits of those on disability I'd need $532,000 invested at 5%.
In other words, even when I was consulting making $140,000 a year, I never had a chance to retire early.
But I mentioned disability didn't I? How do you get that?
I know several people, one in Hawaii (ex-teacher,alcoholic), one in Sacramento (no occupation,panic attacks), that got on disability. You either get a social security lawyer or know the ropes, get a physicalogist referral, shift your assets if any, file the papers and BINGO, you've become the equivalent of a $500,000 retiree at 49. The girl in Hawaii gets free housing near the beach, and Hawaii even pays for auto insurance. Its not fair is it?
Now, a lot of people were raised not to think this way.
But who is smarter, the parents that taught their kids not to work the system and to work until their 70, or the people who are now working the system? Who had more free time to enjoy life?
Monday, January 31, 2005 at 22:54:50 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Sonny, Becky and I ate a Joes Crab Shack
But never mind that...we got into descussion about free electrons, free protons and yada.....
But never mind that...We stumbled on this cool link about the creation of the universe!
PBS's interactive timeline of the universes creation.
Monday, January 31, 2005 at 21:36:46 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
ENERGY AND VIGOR ARE PRECIOUS!
Vacuumed the ductworks, ceiling fan, cleaned the air filter, washed the windows. Blew off the front and back porches. Cleaned and cloroxed the water softener's brine tank and resin bed. Refilled the brine tank with 240lbs of sodium nitrate. Cleaned the 60" TV screen (that's not as easy as it sounds) and realigned the guns. This place smells great.
Oddly enough, I tested my eyesight earlier today and my right eye stunk. Eight hours later, after airing out the house and working outside alot, it's back to being okay.

Monday, January 31, 2005 at 10:15:22 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Web Research: Eye Exams...I did some researching into my failing eyesight and found this
Check out this link: Shows a variety of ailments
Check out this link: Serious Eye Exam
Check out this link too: Test Eye Memory
You'll be amazed at your results.
Monday, January 31, 2005 at 08:20:31 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ah, what a beautiful morning
I feel clear finally. I can see much better. We slept good. It's been quite a while since I've felt this kind of energy. Yipee!
Back to my sick house...what is the problem here? I turned the heat down, its cool in here, but I feel good now. I got to thinking about my air conditioner and it's past. The heat exchanger has cracked twice in the past leaking loads of CO into the house. I'd that f'er cracked again. It must have a poor design to it.
Today, I'm going to install Carbon Monoxide Detectors, check the air conditioner heat exchange, check the exhaust for the water heater, and fix a small leak in my bathrooms skylight.
Becky's going to vacuum everything and dust everything.
We're both going to bleach the water softener system and recharge it.
So it should be a fun day!.
Sunday, January 30, 2005 at 22:42:08 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Now heres a frightening thought. We might have Carbon Monoxide poisoning
I'd never even thought of that. The roofers out here are crap. Two reroofs ago they tiled over a skylight. The last reroof, they sprayed on styrofoam. I wouldn't even be surprised if they blocked up my gas water heater vent. It's in the center of the house.
I you want a shabby roof job, get one in Vegas BTW.
I've had 5 roofs in 20 years. Not a very good average. And those guy, well, they do terrible work with little recourse to get back at them. They own nothing. They hire bums. Their bond is a joke. The Nevada State Commission fines them $120 for $200,000 of bad roofs with code violations. They pay and stay, or don't pay and open shop in Arizona for 5 years, then come back. It's a terribly bad deal for homeowners here.
Sunday, January 30, 2005 at 15:49:29 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I now know what's been making me ill
It's not anything I thought it was. We've been hanging around the house for almost all of December and January. I went out today. After 3 hours, my throat's not sore, I don't ache, my heads almost all the way clear, and I'm not sweating. Sheesh.
My house has spores somewhere.
Sunday, January 30, 2005 at 10:15:07 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ever wonder if someday we'll refer to this country as "Los Estados Unidos de América" someday?
Maybe “Bring Me Your Tired, Your Poor, Your Criminals…” applies to this country.
But so does "Bring Me Your Business and We'll Create A Better World"
Immigration laws are changing all of the time. It's too bad the world's countries can't drop their borders and let this be a free world for all people. But, the United States is the most powerful country in the world. We can't share that, can we now?
Greed is the force that drives nature.
Sunday, January 30, 2005 at 10:03:18 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I love fresh ideas!
I have a story of creation and the end based on the constant decay of protons, but I'll save that for another day when I have more time.
Today may be a mountainous snow day for Becky and the kids.
I still feel like crap though. Becky and I didn't get to sleep until 5am this morning. We're sweating, got sore throats, and I've got a cloud in my head that won't go away.
Sunday, January 30, 2005 at 09:51:28 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ida's thinking about starting a business called "The Happy Housekeeper"
Kind of catchy name don't you think? I like it!
If I don't start feeling better sometime in the next few months, I'm going on disability.
But if I do, I may go with that name. I've have a friend who'll teach me everything I need to know about the janitorial business in Las Vegas.
Once again, thanks Ida.
Sunday, January 30, 2005 at 09:42:17 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Temporin: A temporary cavity filler that I heard about from Ida
Thanks Ida! I knew it wasn't anebesol. I've got a cavity that bugs the heck out of me. You're an Angel Ida. I used some stuff before that lasted two weeks.
I'd like to have the stuff that the dentist uses. I'm sure its got to be cheaper than two visits totalling $400 for one tooth.
Sunday, January 30, 2005 at 00:06:11 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Hot Dangit!
I ate some cube steak. It stuck. That's twice this month. I'm lucky to get it down. The last time I couldn't, it cost $5,000 for surgery.
Sometimes, I think nature is cruel to let us grow old and frail, but I know somehow its in Gods plan.
I'm really sorry to hear my Dad is losing Lottie (his wife for twenty years).
She's going to a home that can care for her. She's Eighty. He's Eighty-Two. That seems to be a cruel reality of nature.
In the beginning, everything was a dark void.
The dark void evolved into matter
Inorganic Matter evolved into Inoganic Systems.
Inorganic Systems evolved into Organic Systems (Life)
Life evolved into Self Aware Life (People)
People created Intelligent Inorganic Systems (Computers)
- Computers extracted energy from inorganic matter.
- Computers were repairable.
- They could be expanded and improved.
- They became so fault tolerant, they never died.
- Computers evolved to became self aware like us.
- Computers needed inorganic systems, not organic systems.
- People became extinct as computers took their rightful place in the evolution.
Universal Systems were created by Computers as they evolved.
The Universe was absorbed by these Universal Systems in a quest for greater expansion.
In the end, everything became a dark void.
Like our lives: From not-living, to living, to not-living.
We are part of a whole system of creation and destruction.
Nothing is created or destroyed. It just evolves.
Nature creates and destroys everything in its evolution.
All of this, everything, will be absorded then dissolved.
Or was the Big Bang the beginning of everything? LOL.
Hey, I can write fiction sometimes. Or is it fiction? I think it is the truth.
Saturday, January 29, 2005 at 19:31:55 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Pretty cool Ida! I liked that!
Becky, Skip and I were sitting in here. Becky and I were swetting up a storm. I'd sure like to know what's going on with our bodies. Wow.
Thankyou.
Saturday, January 29, 2005 at 17:15:25 (PST) <Ida>
Becky & Jim here's a stress reliever game you may like.......http://www.davidandgoliathtees.com/games/throwrocks.html
Saturday, January 29, 2005 at 15:28:18 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Anyway, the bottom line is
We should:
- move out of state
- get the health care we so desparately need
- get some money coming in
And we should do it in the next few months.
Saturday, January 29, 2005 at 14:12:02 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I should delete that last entry.
Saturday, January 29, 2005 at 13:56:38 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
"Save my soul I'm going down for the last time"
Well, not really. But I know things have to change.
I helped Robert out with his truck.
I towed it, then paid for the Car Doctor to fix it. That was money I needed.
He wrecked the truck and wanted my help to get to work. I told him to find another way. I was hungover and wouldn't drive. I won't risk having a seizure on the road. Then he asked to borrow my truck. I said no. Somewhere along the way, someone told Grandmal that I'd been drinking.
Grandmal is going after Becky for child support
She kicks Becky out so she can live with the kids rent free. Steals Beckys last SS check. Then goes after Becky for child support, meaning Becky should move out of state. And she thinks she's teaching the kids good ways. Wonderful example!
I'm helping Skip get his act together
Any money I give him goes to alcohol or gambling. He is trying to find work though. But it'll cost me for him to find work.
I let David stay the night last night.
We watched movies, and got two large pizza's. He hit me up for money today.
I'm an alcoholic, and I need help
I don't want to die, but I will if I don't get help. My mind is going, I have a host of problems (carpal tunnel and hip pain). I can't afford health insurance. My mind needs to be retrained. I need insurance or to go on disability.
I'll be broke in two years
I wouldn't hire someone like me. People think I'm made of money because I have property. I earned everything I have. I'll end up homeless if things don't change. How many people can I help when nothing is coming in?
On the plus side
Becky loves me with all of her heart. It's mutual. Most of the people I know would be lucky to have love like ours.
Mikey has turned out to be one of the most honorable people I've ever known.
Sonny is totally trustworthy.
Skip when he gets his act together will overpay me everything that I've thrown his way.
I still have my integrety. I care, I help people, I do nice things for people every day. I'm a good person.
But I need help now or I'll die.
These are the days of my life.
Friday, January 28, 2005 at 16:47:14 (PST) <Mike>
Jimmy... Headhunters are a rare breed and very superstitious. They'd just as much as anything submit everybody, qualified for a job or not, to a job opening and have the person interviewed and hired. But, they develop a certain level of experience to know certain things happen under certain job market conditions. If the market were really hot for jobs (they were plentyful), hiring managers at Kevin's clients would be begging for any sort of qualified candidate. But, as Kevin explained, a hiring manager, correct or not in doing so, only seems to want to see workers a bit more current. I ran into it when I was looking in 2001-2003 too. Like Don Catino who told me he wouldn't submit me to a job I was 100% qualified for, because I had only been out of work 20 months, while John Doe was out of work for 22 months. Like I cared!!!
Thursday, January 27, 2005 at 11:00:58 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
BTW Mikey
I know you're right about my resume being inactive for 3 years. People are so picky. Kevin saw my resume and thought that was a problem. I wonder if brick layers get into trouble by taking some time off. ***SMILES***
Thursday, January 27, 2005 at 10:56:58 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Yea Mikey...I had a simular problem creating a dual boot c: drive
I wanted Windows 2000 server and Window98 to run on the same system. It was a real pain. I think when you do that, you get a file called boot.sys which you can edit, but it's risky.
Thursday, January 27, 2005 at 10:19:00 (PST) <Mike - The one who calls Squirty a cat...>
Jimmy... What you up to these days? That Linux I bought at Fly's hosed my system. It went and totally repartitioned my HDD even when I said not to do so. Now I am fighting to get the liptop running again. Have a recent backup, but it's a pain. In a Internet Cafe right now. Long live MS Windows... Down with Linux... At least poorly written installation packages. Oh, btw, Good Morning Ms. Rebecca (Grandma)...
Thursday, January 27, 2005 at 05:11:27 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I woke up early this morning around 4am
Already, I've chatted with Allen Harmon (who's in Missouri). Jeanette just called (who's in California). David and Sonny came over yesterday, and my phone was ringing off the hook.
Jeanette worry's me. It's a strange time to call. She talked to me like Rob did before he committed suicide. That's a scary thought but they definitely have a purpose.
Thursday, January 27, 2005 at 04:52:06 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I've been reading about life extensionist and life regeneratists.
Life extensionist believe they can extend life multifold. They may take drugs on the following list: Life Extending Drugs
Life regeneratists believe that in 200 or more years, mankind will be able to revive the dead. I do! So they have themselves frozen.
I wonder if that's what ancient the Indians and Egyptians thougth during mummyfication
Makes since, if you believe our species will just keep getting more intelligent.
I've read that our life expency has increased:
By fewer baby deaths. That would throw off the average. I've also read that better meds are the reason too, but unless it's antibiotics, I'm not seeing much coming from science (VIOX, steriods,...). The general concensious is that life prolonging drugs have been found and not released to the public. HGH (Human Growth Hormone) would be my pick. It actually reverses aging.
My guess is nature has designed us to live 70 years.
Changing your diet, taking aspirins, doing drugs and working out don't really change our life styles that much. Those different things aren't cumulitive. In other words, you quit smoking (adds 6 years to your life span), quit drinking (5 years). Together, they don't increase your lifespan 11 years. Dieting and exercise don't seem to our increase live span.
I'm only talking about this because I don't want to die, ever.
Twenty years from now, technology will be light-years ahead. But besides that, most of my good friends and best relatives are dead. I really don't want to join, ever.
Tuesday, January 25, 2005 at 20:45:35 (PST) <Ida>
HEY JIM! WELL JUST FINISHED CHATTING WITH THE NEW FELLA........tOM'S HIS NAME....LOL......AND HE THREW ME A HUGE CURVE.....AS WE TALKED FOR THE LONGEST TIME......HE SAYS.......NOT BEING TOO FORWARD .........BUT I THINK IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT.........I JUST FROZE IN MY CHAIR HERE AS EVERY NERVE IN MY BODY TINGLED..........IT WAS THE STRANGEST FEELING I'VE HAD...........I WAS STUNNED........AT A LOSS FOR WORDS......I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO REPLY........HE MAKES ME HAPPY.....I AM SO GLAD I CONSENTED TO MEET WITH HIM AFTER HE HOUNDED ME FOR WEEKS.....WE HAVE GREAT TIMES TOGETHER(NOT JUST SEX EITHER)......WE BOTH HAVE MUCH IN COMMON. AND HE LIVES IN THE WOODS ON 15 BEAUTIFUL ACRES OF LAND THAT HE OWNS..WHAT I MEAN IS...IT'S PAID FOR.......WHO KNOWS?????LOL.....JUST MAYBE.........MAYBE....THIS COULD BE HIM.......LOL....BUT WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS BEFORE.........LOL.....TIME WILL TELL......HUGS ......LUV YA TWO..........
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 21:01:14 (PST) <Ida(WHAT HAVE WE DONE)>
AFTER JUST RECEIVING AN EMAIL FROM A FRIEND I THOUGHT LONG AND HARD.......... AND THIS IS WHAT I CAME UP WITH: IT SEEMS YEARS AGO PEOPLE LIVED LONGER, WENT TO THE DOCTOR LESS. KIND OF MAKES YOU THINK A LOT ABOUT THIS FACT. DO YOU THINK ALL THE PRESERVATIVES THAT IS IN EVERYTHING HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS? WE ADDED PRESERVATIVES TO PRESERVE FOOD........BUT IS IT PRESERVING US? OR DESTROYING US? ARE WE NOT GOING TO THE DOCTORS MORE DUE TO HEART PROBLEMS,DIABETES,CANCER.....BECAUSE OF ALL THE PRESERVATIVES THAT ARE IN JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING WE CONSUME OR USE IN OUR EVERYDAY NORMAL LIVES. NOT ONLY IS IT IN THE FOOD WE EAT BUT ALSO IN THE THINGS WE USE TO CLEANSE OURSELVES WITH. GOOD HEALTHY EATING OF COMMON FOODS KEPT US FROM BEING SICK. GOOD CLEANSING WITH NOT ALL THE ADDITIVES KEPT US CLEAN AND FRESH SMELLING, FOR WE WERE CLEAN AND NOT MASKED WITH ALL THESE PERFUMES ETC. FARM ANIMALS WERE NOT INJECTED WITH MEDS TO MAKE THEM GROW MORE OR LARGER THEY WERE GRAZING NATURALLY. EVERYTHING WAS NATURAL AND NOT ARTIFICIAL. EVEN TO THE TOBACCO PEOPLE ROLLED THEIR OWN AS THEY GREW THE TOBACCO WITHOUT ALL THE ADDITIVES TO KEEP IT FRESH? SO IS THIS WHY A LOT OF PEOPLE DIE FROM CIGARETTES NOW? SO ALL IN ALL ARE THESE THINGS REALLY GOOD? LIKE DOES MILK REALLY DO A BODY GOOD? JUST WHAT IS IN THE MILK? OR ANYTHING ELSE FOR THAT MATTER?.........THINK ABOUT THIS AND GIVE ME YOUR VIEWS ON THIS ........
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 14:09:03 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Theres an 'In God we trust' on every penny we spend
I'm not sure what that means...who'se god, who believes in God these days. Let me say this...in all of the worlds intracasies, with all of life's secrets, how can we not believe there's a designer.
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 12:57:36 (PST) <Ida>
A Penny You always hear the usual stories of pennies on the sidewalk being good luck, gifts from angels, etc. This is the first time I've ever heard this twist on the story. Gives you something to think about. Several years ago, a friend of mine and her husband were invited to spend the weekend at the husband's employer's home. My friend, Arlene, was nervous about the weekend. The boss was very wealthy, with a fine home on the waterway, and cars costing more than her house. The first day and evening went well, and Arlene was delighted to have this rare glimpse into how the very wealthy live. The husband's employer was quite generous as a host, and took them to the finest restaurants. Arlene knew she would never have the opportunity to indulge in this kind of extravagance again, so was enjoying herself immensely. As the three of them were about to enter an exclusive restaurant that evening, the boss was walking slightly ahead of Arlene and her husband. He stopped suddenly, looking down on the pavement for a long, silent moment. Arlene wondered if she was supposed to pass him. There was nothing on the ground except a single darkened penny that someone had dropped, and a few cigarette butts. Still silent, the man reached down and picked up the penny. He held it up and smiled, then put it in his pocket as if he had found a great treasure. How absurd! What need did this man have for a single penny? Why would he even take the time to stop and pick it up? Throughout dinner, the entire scene nagged at her. Finally, she could stand it no longer. She causally mentioned that her daughter once had a coin collection, and asked if the penny he had found had been of some value. A smile crept across the man's face as he reached into his pocket for the penny and held it out for her to see. She had seen many pennies before! What was the point of this? "Look at it." He said. "Read what it says." She read the words "United States of America." "No, not that; read further." "One cent?" "No, keep reading." "In God we Trust?" "Yes!" "And?" "And if I trust in God, the name of God is holy, even on a coin. Whenever I find a coin I see that inscription. It is written on every single United States coin, but we never seem to notice it! God drops a message right in front of me telling me to trust Him? Who am I to pass it by? When I see a coin, I pray, I stop to see if my trust IS in God at that moment. I pick the coin up as a response to God; that I do trust in Him. For a short time, at least, I cherish it as if it were gold.. I think it is God's way of starting a conversation with me. Lucky for me, God is patient and pennies are plentiful. When I was out shopping today, I found a penny on the sidewalk. I stopped and picked it up, and realized that I had been worrying and fretting in my mind about things I cannot change. I read the words, "In God We Trust," and had to laugh. Yes, God, I get the message. It seems that I have been finding an inordinate number of pennies in the last few months, but then, pennies are plentiful! And, God is patient...
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 07:53:52 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
To anybody out there playing the Job Hunting Game
Remember thats it is on longer what you can do, it's how well you are liked. That's the key.
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 07:50:09 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Like I said, my blog only lives when people live it.
Here, I splat out words thats probably meaningless to most people. To some, its a chance to say something. This is my chance to make a difference.
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 07:36:17 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Its off our asses to talk our shit
Still, I have nothing laughable as a job. Nobody want's to hire me with an attidude like I'm better than everyone else. I wanna be a nigger! LOL
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 05:38:29 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Paradoxes
A paradox is a structure that ends where it begins, like the beginning of a circle.
A paradox is life.
Why should we be necessary to this world. Viruses retain their memories from life time to life time. They infect an absorbent cell. They have no means to reproduce. They just infect. They are the retaineres of the secrets of life.
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 05:13:03 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ever get stuck on a phrase?
The truth is a lie yet discovered.
I love you means that some day I'll hate you.
Someday, never comes!
God is love! And he'll strike you down in hell fire if you don't worship him!
Ya know what I especially love about this life...it's my dog. Squirt loves me unconditionally. He's right here at my feet, right now. He doesn't care that I'm simi-wasted. He's just there, giving me his all.
Most of the people I know now are wonderful
Of all the people I know now, there's only a few that I object too. Even they aren't that bad. They mean good. And, well, isn't that all that counts. Nobody's so smart that they predict how things will fall once an item is laid down.
I think that if we try to do good, without telling everyone that your neighbor Mrs Brown needs to be HUNG
Then you're on the right track! **smiles**
Monday, January 24, 2005 at 05:01:03 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Yesterday was just another day, but unlike no other
Becky's mom brought Dustin and Jennifer over, then she picked them up four hours later. That was GREAT! I didn't want to be out there driving around.
Robert said Joy's dad (or granddad) wrecked Robert's truck
Uh Oh! That's incredibly bad news. I mentioned quietly destroying the vehicle (like most people do), but now, that's not possible unless the whole thing is totally demolished. sheesh.
I did something terrible.
Robert asked me if he could use my truck. I turned him down. My reasons were thoroughly selfish. Self preservation should be at the top of anyone's list. Giving should be second. If giving is first, then you've got to have faith in God to take care of you. I can't rely on God myself. I just think he acts through me.
Sunday, January 23, 2005 at 01:26:47 (PST) <Ida>
Just checked the blog and it's just a beating.....LOL..rocking today or so it seems. I love squirty he types so well. Where is my picture of this cute little pup?
Sunday, January 23, 2005 at 00:19:16 (PST) <robert>
If you get caught between the moon and New York City
Its the thing....its about love and the place...feel yourself...feel the place!
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 23:51:54 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I've got to say this!
My dreams about going north, when the roads run out...when I'm at the worlds freezing point is not about me committing suicide...it's about self preservation.
I believe, in 20 years or so, science will have the ability to raise the dead. I would want to be one of exceptional people. You don't get that way by being a meter reader. You get that way by being exceptional or different.
Think about it...why would future society dig you up?
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 23:42:27 (PST) <Squirty>
Mike, Becky, Sonny, Joy, Robert, Cheryl, Jan, Rob, Timmy...all you guys
The world works on momentum. 100 years, nothing will matter, except for the way we care about each other. These moments are so special! Thanks for being in my life!
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 23:37:20 (PST) <Squirty>
Now that's what I'm talking about
Mike spent the day with us. Never mind, that I had a few drinks on Wednesday and have to drink to avoid a seizure...never mind that thats just the way it is.
I loved the day because Mike was here. He's just a simple, but beautiful person! So kind. Totally generous. He's just a good man. Like the man I hope I'll be some day.
I've padded my world with people like Mike.
They aren't rich. They aren't exceptional by national standards. They are special by my standards. These are the people I didn't have time for back when I was so busy building a career.
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 16:59:56 (PST) <Squirty>
hello everybody
Wow I woke up after sleeping 14 hrs tonight I slept so good even though the bed is hard as a rock I slept awesome. Jim comes in talking about dreams, you know dreams are a wonderful thing to me it takes me to another world we dont even know exist and its just another part of u that nobody else can get into to. well Jim and Mike are off to the road again. Oh yea Hello Mike good to see you. well love u all.
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 16:33:01 (PST) <Squirty>
Hello. My name is Squirty, and I am Jim and rebecca's little puppy dog. Excuse me for any mistyped words, as I never went to school and my paws don't fit this keyboard. Just wanted to thank everybody for the attention, but who is that guy in the brown shirt who keeps calling me a cat?
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 16:25:39 (PST) <Mike>
Long live Jimmy and Ms. Rebecca... It's so great seeing them both... Now I know I was born for more than just eating corn and playing my horn...
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 14:28:24 (PST) <Joy>
Hey Jim,Becky,squirt Thanks for everything. You guys have helpd me Robert and Amy out alot and if I could I would repay you. I just wanted to say thanx a bunch. I dont think i say it enough so thanx.
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 10:00:44 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
The day took off with a BANG
Becky's mom called at 9:30. I told her we were picking up a friend at the airport. Boy, is she pissed! Oh well, she's always pissed about something. I'd guess we wrecked her shopping day or something. Still, I should apologize.
Robert and Joy are sleeping in. Skip's watching a movie. Becky's blow drying her hair. I'm ready to go, but here I am waiting for the next move. ** smiles **. Life is good!
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 00:27:15 (PST) <robert>
HELLO EVERYBODY
How are you guys. This is great spending the night at your house visiting and watchin movies. I love it. I feel like this is my real family. Well, I love you guys much and will chat to u later
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 00:25:44 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Now that's AMAZING
I showed Robert how to key in some simple HTML...and he absorbed it all...the first time, right off the bat. This is a guy I want by my side. You can email me Robert at Robert at msn.com
Saturday, January 22, 2005 at 00:11:21 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Robert and Joy are spending the night
I'm gonna pick up Mike at the airport at 10:30 tommorrow morning.
This should be an interesting weekend. The kind I like.
Now, the night started with replacing Robert's left brake rotor with one that was legal. The car lot sold him a defective vehicle. That shouldn't go unchecked. But in this case it will. Buyer beware is only ineffect for person to person purchases.
The brakes could have caused death. That's reason to pursue the perpetrator. The car lot that sold him a vehicle, with one rotor under specs, and the other at specs. That is unconscionsable. But...then again, the evidence sits in my dumpster. hmmm.
Friday, January 21, 2005 at 23:26:51 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
The BLOG...IT'S ALIVE!!!!
Thanks Ida. It's alive...It's alive...It's alive...
As long as we're alive, this blog will be here, and I'm gonna love you forever!
Think about this: This blog may outlive us both...I'm going to finance it to be that way.
Now, nothing we write will be in stone, but it will be written...and that's cool! History is what people write down from their point of view.
Friday, January 21, 2005 at 23:07:53 (PST) <Ida>
HEAVY WORKLOAD THIS WEEKEND JIM SO GUESS I WILL MISS YA....DOING A LOAD OF LAUNDRY....HAD A GREAT DAY.........MISS YA....KEEP THE BLOG GOING......I LOVE IT......IDA
Friday, January 21, 2005 at 09:48:27 (PST) <Mike Ginsburg>
Jimmy.... Hope all is well. Just sent you a lengthy email. Also, the headhunter called me this morning and sai the phone interview went very well yesterday.
Friday, January 21, 2005 at 09:38:39 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ahern Rentals hired Robert as a truck driver. He'll be making $12.50 an hour
That sounds pretty decent. He said Ahern will train him for a CDL license. That's so much better than being a security guard!
Thursday, January 20, 2005 at 15:19:10 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Have you ever had a 5 inch hair sprout from your eyebrow overnight?
A white hair popped out of my eyebrow sometime last night. wow.
Where do they come from? Can the hair be filmed spouting from your head? How does it work?
I've always had the notion that the hair is coiled up under the skin and at the right time shoots out. "Curious Minds" wants to know!
Thursday, January 20, 2005 at 13:47:26 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Oh no...we just got up in the afternoon
Wow...that wrecks the whole day!
I talked to Mike Ginsburg. I was worried about him, and until today I havent' been able to contact him. He's cool. When I talked to him on his cell phone, his other phone rang, and it was a phone interview. Cool! Good for him.
Wednesday, January 19, 2005 at 20:53:56 (PST) <Ida>
Hi Jim! I guess you aren't online yet. I still have this damn stomach crap whatever it is.
Good News! Mom did excellent with her eye surgery today!! I take her back tomorrow for a follow up. I had to ask Brad to let me off tomorrow. Prick loaded my schedule up! I'd asked for Friday off to go out to dinner with a bunch of friends and he scheduled me. Go figure! He's my boss.......lol guess he can do that. Anyway I hope to write more later on when I am feeling better. This is the worst I've ever felt in my life . I remember Allen's remedy about "toast' and being a sponge.......well he was right as usual.......I am eating dry toast and feeling a bit better. I am afraid to eat anything except toast or 7up. LOL.....maybe I'll lose some of this "fat".....
I luv ya Jim my friend........Hugs
Wednesday, January 19, 2005 at 00:00:00 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I grabbed a copy of Eliza on the net. I'm gonna make the program talk like me.
This is fun! The program is written in JavaScript, which, I think, is one of the most elegant languages around these days. Eliza is a computer program that is designed to chat with anyone, using Rogerian Psychology. It takes what a person says, conjugates the sentences (turns I am to you are), then looks for key words in the sentence, and then it spits out a response. With a few tweaks, it can talk like anybody with a personality. I should have it posted on the net in a couple of days (but I'll say its my 24x7 Instant Messenger).
Tuesday, January 18, 2005 at 00:00:00 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Robert and Joy brought little Amy over
Little Amy is SO CUTE! She's smiling now.
They said Paul (Becky's brother) is kicking them out in 2 months. They think Gramma wants to move Renee back in.
So now, how does it go?
Gramma is tired of cleaning the house. She gets Paul to evict Robert, Joy, and the baby. Robert pays rent to Paul, but that doesn't do Gramma any good. Gramma doesn't pay rent. Gramma tells Paul she wants to move Renee (Becky's daughter) back in. Paul kicked Renee out because she was having sex with kids in front of the children and doing other unconscionable things. However, Renee is a very good housekeeper. It's no secret that Paul and Renee have a special thing going. Once again, I'm thoroughly disgusted with Gramma. She's supports incest or anything else to that gets her own wants. She has no conscience, and she'll step on anybody who gets in her way, even if only just slightly, and Paul is her dupe. She's going to hell if there is one.
We've got to get Becky's kids out of that house!
Monday, January 17, 2005 at 15:51:38 (PST) <Ida >
Thanks Jim ! It is so wonderful chatting with you. What a great friend you are to me.
No wonder I love you like I do, even though we have never met face to face.....tell Becky I love her as well. Now go watch that movie before you have to take it back .........Love ya.....
Monday, January 17, 2005 at 11:17:06 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Martin Luther Kings Birthday
I got up this morning with good intentions. Here it is 11:15am, and still don't have my eyes fully openned. Its a strange time. By chance, it seems Becky and I've chatted with all Allen and most of his old girlfriends today. I gotta get a life!
I emailed Michelle (headhunter) this morning
Called her Laura (another headhuter) by mistake...sheese. That's so embarrassing. She said Northrop isn't replacing Mike, and that's good news!
Sunday, January 16, 2005 at 04:26:38 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Tender Years
When the moon hung soft and low, catchin' stardust in the light
You held me closer and closer. There was magic in the night
A sweet love song, a melody...that I still can recall
Two young hearts filled with dreams, to walk away with it all
A summer love, a beach romance, I sought her kisses in the sand
Two young hearts filled with fire. Lost in never-neverland
Oh tender years. Won't you wash away my tears
How I wish that you were here. Please don't go tender years.

Please don't go.

Sunday, January 16, 2005 at 04:01:44 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
DREAMLAND
Here I am, waking up at 2am from another dream
I drempt Rob called me on the phone. I was sitting at my laptop and Death, my old friend, was sitting in the living room. Rob said "I just called to see how you were". I said "Rob, I need you, we're partners, I love ya man". Rob said "yea" like he was smiling but busy doing something. I said "Say something! Drop whatever you're doing". Rob said "ok" but he still sounded distant. I told Death, "Rob's on the phone, see I told you he calls me". Death seemed mildly surprised, but probably didn't believe me. I wanted to put Rob on the speaker phone, but he wasn't saying much anyway. I woke up, and remembered more dreams.
Cool dream, I think.
I've enjoyed my dreams since I was probably 4.
I used to fly around in my bed with two angels. The three of us would fly around the world. I used to wake up laughing alot! Dreams are always great.
I've always thought of dreams as a friend, a link to my subconscience.
We are more than what we seem to be. Our subsconscious tags along with us quietly day after day. Dreams provide easy access to it. I've used dreams to solve problems that are out of reach to my conscious. I go to bed with a problem and wake up with the answers. It always works. I also think of my subconsious as if it were a communicator with God.
I break down every dream, no matter how silly
They are easy to understand, and easy to break down with practice. They usually don't mean much. Most of the time, they are a patchwork of memories strewn out over the last day, week, year and over a life time. They stitch themselves together at night to somehow relate to the day gone by. The best part of breaking down dreams is the more I do it, the more I understand this wonderful life.
I've reached deeper, more beautiful levels of consciousness through hallucinagens.
I don't do that any more, but I have seen the other levels of the mind. I know they exists and are there all of the time just like the subconscious. These worlds were either projected from within my mind, or I was able to see them through access to additional senses. Whatever the case, I've seen "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds".
I drempt gravity is the result of all mass expanding at light speed.
Gravity works through subatomic particles that have no mass influencing particles that do. How else would mass attract mass from all sides, and all levels? I've heard mass is supposed to cause a warp in the space-time continuum, but you could say that about a rock thrown in a pond.
Only in dreams, you say. But when you know that everything you see is made up of molecules vibrating at the speed of light, anything might be possible. Or maybe there is a graviton. lol. Anyway, it seemed like a simple solution to me.
Maybe gravity works on sympathetic vibration somehow, like magnetism. That's how radio's work. For a radio to work, a magnetic vibration (carrier) is sent out, with various levels of stength (amplitude). The radio recieves all vibrations withing the scope of its antenna. A tuner sychronizes with the carrier and converts it to its built in vibration (intermediate). The intermediate frequency is stripped out, leaving the various levels of strength (amplitude). The amplitude is the sound information which then is amplified to the speakers.
Simple enough, but to make it work, the founders had to experiment with all kinds of configurations of crystals, coils, capacitors and diodes. You could easily build something simular using gears or hydraulics.
The simplest example of sympathetic vibration can be shown with tuning forks
You take a 'D' tuning fork and strike it. If you have several other tuning forks of different sizes lined up near by with a 'D' tuning fork in them, you'd notice that the 'D' tuning fork is influenced the most by the sound. It starts vibrating and that's sympathetic vibration.
If a perfect vacuum doesn't exist, then space is an ocean of matter.
I would think black holes are a perfect vacuum though. I wish I could live to see more space exploration. Imagine a vast region of seemingly empty space which consists of molecules never found before. With DNA being so incredible on the micro levels, anything is possible on the macro levels. The universe could be part of cell of something unimaginably huge.
That would be one of the 26+ dimensions. A point, line, square, cube, time, perspective, micro, macro, vibration,...I'll look them up sometime. I would think consciousness would be a dimension of though.
Goodnight all...I'm going back into Dreamland to talk to my friend Rob again!
Saturday, January 15, 2005 at 05:23:07 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
WE ALL ARE ON THE BORDERLINE OF INSANITY
I woke up this AM coughing, dang flu just won't let go!
I was dreaming about the flu and how these little germs were flying around the bedroom like the fighter jets at Nellis. How do germs survive when its not the flu season? I've got a theory, I think they've got a little base camp set up on my bathroom wall, or maybe in my toothbrush.
It surves me right though, with all the things I've eaten, it's about time something ate me. I never think it might be something I can't even see.
Delirious at 4am. I never have nightmares, I guess because I like horror shows, but
Sometimes I hit on thoughts that are so odd. I sometimes wonder if my oldest sister, Linda, became insane from a single thought. What could it be? I figure insanity is when the world inside the mind becomes more real than the world outside. There's got to be a lot of truth to that.
I was watching an episode of CSI: Las Vegas
It showed a crack whore on Washington and D street (the dark side of Vegas). She was in withdrawels. She said, "I drempt Adam and Eve took me to a drive-in. The movie was about my life. I didn't want to watch it. Adam told me that God said I had to, so I watched to the end."
The bizarre thoughts of schizophrenics have always fascinated me.
But there I was in bed, dreaming about flu germs flying in formation. At least my dreams are kind of funny.
Continuing this thought line, I had a DUI in 1985, where I talked an insane guy
Now, I wasn't in jail that long, and I hated it, but there was this one big guy, sitting on a bench, watching the ground and waving his hands around. I sat next to him, and he asked me for a cigarette. I asked him what he was doing. He said, Las Angelos has scabs living underground. I'm blowing them up. I thought about that. In this jail, with one TV and 20 people, and bologna sandwiches made with yellow bread, he was content. I hated being there, but he was ok. If I had that kind of vivid imagination there's no telling what kind of books I could write.
Creativity and intelligence are natures greatest inventions. With art, music and story telling being an offshoot, insanity must belong right in there with them, as so are our dreams.
Thursday, January 13, 2005 at 23:12:29 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I gotta admit, I've got a lot of faith
I contacted STJ Inc today, talked to Jay Westbrook. It may go nowhere, but, its a shot. Mike Ginsburg's contract is up in LA, he's going through STJ for a new one. They've got some spots opened in Florida.
I don't know where or what I'm going to be doing next, but I'm not worried.
I've always pulled through with something. Something always comes up. I doubt if I'll ever eat out of a dumpster for survival. I have a lot of faith in life. I do good, it'll come back. We all die, so everything in between is free.
I want a Burping Becky Baby Doll for my Birthday
I guess I got my present early. lol. We polished off a Chinese Buffet tonight, came home and she gave me my birthday present while sitting on the couch - A Burping Becky Baby Doll. Life is good!
Wednesday, January 12, 2005 at 08:56:40 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Flipper saves Indonesians
A dolphin was washed in-shore in SE Asia. Fishermen, and emerency crews spent days rescuing the beached dolphin. After returning the dolphin to the ocean, hungry villagers caught him, and ate him. Dolphins are a mans best friend,especially if you're hungry!
Tuesday, January 11, 2005 at 12:27:22 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Checked out ParaToys.Com
Just curious how much a tour business might cost. Looks like a dual seated trike should end up costing around $20,000. Hmmm. Not as cheap as I expected.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005 at 10:42:25 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Winds are high in Vegas
The winds blew down my back neighbors fence (it was his silly solution to keeping in his dogs). He put up fiberglass awning material that was 10' high. Now its everywhere. Silly people. He should have let the dogs put it up. :)
Reading about Parapropter's
Here are some Parapropter Plans that someone is selling on the net. Interesting. I was thinking about Allens SkiBike. He should sell the plans, instead of trying to get the bike manufactured by Honda!
Sunday, January 09, 2005 at 11:36:20 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
The flu season is almost over for this household
It couldn't have happened sooner. After pretty much four days in bed, the delirium, sweats, aches and pains are almost gone. And that ain't bad.
Thursday, January 06, 2005 at 22:14:32 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
So many things seem so important to us, but in 100 years none of these things will matter
What will matter is what we accomplished in this life. For most people, all they contribute is children. For others, they build a foundation for others to build on. Technology is a good foundation. I'm glad I had a part in it. If no one even remembers my name 1 year after I'm gone, I'll have laid the stone work somewhere on the bottom of a great accomplishment that will change the world. That is what we are here for, those little things that don't even name you as a contributor.
Thursday, January 06, 2005 at 21:39:20 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ida, noone is pissed at you
How can anyone be pissed at a hot little rocket like you? You're great! And you're a good writer too. And getting blasted for a night doesn't count. Everybody does it. In this town, you go to one of the bars (on every block) and exchange wild stories with strangers. Noone actually believes anything anyone says when they're partying. That would be foolish.
But as we all know A fool and his money are soon partying
**smiles**
I was laying back in bed by Becky's side
And Squirt started licking my hand. Aren't dogs so special. No matter what, they love and stick by you. They don't even care how you look in the morning. This dog is excellent.
Thursday, January 06, 2005 at 20:03:07 (PST) <Ida>
I thought perhaps I would write something significant in here now. Let me see....... In my mind lately it seems to be shadowed with doubt, The path I've chosen....well I want out. I want to be free and happy you see, Can't you accept me for who I be? If you don't like what you see, Then run real far away from me. For I am laughter and I am joy, I no longer search for the right boy. He will find me hopefully some day, I look to God as I pray. I am tired of all the games they play, Which causes me to take off and run away. From the fear of someone to close to me, Is why I run away you see. Ida P. Staley 1/6/2005
Thursday, January 06, 2005 at 19:47:35 (PST) <Ida>
Did I tell you how much I like this thing you made?
Thursday, January 06, 2005 at 19:45:22 (PST) <Ida>
Hello Jim & Becky!.....I hope she gets to feeling my better.......I don't have all that to worry about as mother nature took care of me good. I apologize for any intoxicating actions last night. But I told you that already. I guess ole Al is pissed at me....maybe this will get him thinking........later.......Idie
Thursday, January 06, 2005 at 15:34:58 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Becky's all sick
Oh hecko! She's got hot flashes and her glands are swollen.
I'm glad I'm a man and don't have all of those female attachments that are problematic.
Thursday, January 06, 2005 at 15:15:56 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ate at the Outback last night
They're food is always so excellent, there, and the day after.
Becky is still asleep afer 15 hours. wow. I guess she should stay away from Strawberry Daiquiri's. She had one.
Talked to Allen and Ida today.
Skip's been gone for two days now. Hopefully he's alright.
Another dull day. Everyone is so depressed it seems. blah!
We all need to get out more often!
Wednesday, January 05, 2005 at 10:23:24 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
The Perfect Occupation
Working two jobs. One as a taste tester for Bud Light, the other rating TV shows for the Neilsons Ratings. One remote control could have the ratings buttons right on it! I'm sending them my resume this morning...lol
Wednesday, January 05, 2005 at 10:19:40 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
GMorning World!
The thing about what Paul did Robert, well, it was just a stupid thing. We need to get him a woman. With women everywhere you look around here, scantily clad, big smiles, eager to talk, I just have to figure he's shy. We all have our demons to fight. Becky and I have to get off of our lazy butts and go back to work. Laziness is an addictive little booger too! **smiles**
Tuesday, January 04, 2005 at 22:20:26 (PST) <robert >
Hello Jim, Mom, and Squirt!!
Something about that name Squirt makes me thirsty. Anyways, today I sat at home. Paul didn't bother Joy or I. Boy everytime I see him it sux, a lot of trust has been lost. I thought he was good family to me but I guess I learned wrong. Really the closest and best family to me is Jim and Mom. Now thats what you call honest, real, and reliable people there. Everytime I have needed help with something or a project Jim was always their. Since that incident with Paul and Joy I feel as if my trust and life has done one big u turn. But anyways I guess we all learn the hard way and I learned. Well I love you Jim and Mom. Thx for everything Love Robert
Tuesday, January 04, 2005 at 11:09:52 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
All is quiet here
Robert, Joy and Amy went back home.
Skip is gone.
It's just me, Becky and Squirt.
Uh oh, someone's knocking. brb.
Tuesday, January 04, 2005 at 10:42:59 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Robert, I moved your jokes over to a special area
Hope you don't mind. Actually, I created an area called Jokes in my guest area. I've been collecting jokes since time began. You'll see more popping up there soon.
Tuesday, January 04, 2005 at 02:50:02 (PST) <robert>
Here u go. I thought you would like these lol: Bathroom Jokes
Monday, January 03, 2005 at 04:30:28 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Its interesting that most molestations occur between family members
From what I've heard, most girls are raped or molested within the household. It seems like a dumb thing to do, but it's convenient. I've talked to most of my girlfriends, and its always the same story...it's an uncle, brother, dad, or someone close to the family who does the acts. Its almost never a stranger. The statistics don't get reported but I'd bet 1 in 3 women have been molested by a family member.
Monday, January 03, 2005 at 04:23:20 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
It seems Becky's brother made a pass at Robert's girlfriend tonight
What compells people to do that. All is well, but still, there's some shattered emotions around here. Paul is a good man. He's just lonely, and a little meglamaniacal. All is forgotten about the incident, but why hit on you cousins girlfriend when there's plenty of horny women out here. I don't get it. Bad things happen inside a household more than outside of it. I guess home is an easy target for predetors. The best that I can figure is he doesn't have the knowledge and tools to find women in Vegas. Here, its easy. You can get laid every day by someone new. Evil dwells close to home, because the pray is an easy target. So bad.
Monday, January 03, 2005 at 04:13:34 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Ida, chatting with you was so special tonight
We've been friends sight unseen for over 5 years. You are a sweetheart and there is a special place for you in my heart. Becky on the other hand, misses talking to you. Say hi to her. She's not jealous of you. She just likes hearing from you. This holiday season, we got not cards, no ecards, few calls. It's been kind of depressing. I got tipsy New Years and called some people. They all sounded like we were friends from yesterday. But still, the contact came from us. Sometimes, I feel like we've fallen off of the face of the earth. Becky especially.
Sunday, January 02, 2005 at 23:07:59 (PST) <Ida Staley>
My dearest friend .....tonight I read this and I am so proud of you Jim and I love you always.
We talked at length about our friendship, lives, Allen.......Yes I still love him......God only knows.....I keep asking him why? Jim you are very wise my dear friend....Sometimes I just wish.........Oh heck I need to get my silly ass to bed...perhaps I may write something a bit better next time......Love you and Becky......Ida
Sunday, January 02, 2005 at 21:49:41 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Theres something else I want to say
I don't see us as individual life forms. I see this planet as being a baby 8 billion years ago in its premordial soup. The whole planet has evolved, grown new entitities, and who knows, in 10 trillion years, anything is possible. Life always finds a way to improve itself. Just look around you. You'll see I'm right. Every kind of device (living thing) is all around us. From plants that harvest solar energy and dirt, to animals that pray on other animals or plants. We're growing, as a group. Our DNA is simular to that of a tree. We're all related. We're a team. And we're growing. So I say, we'll never die, we'll just gain knew persectives of the universe until we become the universe.
Sunday, January 02, 2005 at 21:38:00 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Hey Robert, man, you are so special to me
And there's no way I'm going to commit suicide even though the thought has crossed my mind. I tend to see the future as a place of promise. Every year gets better. I love your mom more than you'll ever know. And you, Joy, and Amy are my best friends. How could I leave that? Besides, I'm living the good life, doing whatever I want, laughing, loving...every day is a pleasure. I do like to get high, but, that's not because I'm depressed. It's because in my dreams, anything is possible. I'm sticking around and I want to help this universe grow to its maturity. We're all responsible for that. Like when a sperm meeting an ovum, we're part of whatever this is going to be. We'll never die. We're part of it all. But I do love my dreams. Love ya!
Sunday, January 02, 2005 at 20:46:01 (PST) <robert >
Hello Jim, I just want you to know I love you very much and don't you ever think of doing what your buddies did.
I was worried there for a bit about you. I just want you to know there are too many people that really really care about you and we are always their for you for thick and thin. Ok, bud. Love you and thx for all the happy times we have had.
Mom I love you to lol. Anyways, Happy New Years and hope this is a better one. Better yet lets make this a better one. Love ya all
Sunday, January 02, 2005 at 19:20:26 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Good Day
Robert, Joy, Amy, Jennifer, and Dustin came over for several hours. We played Double Cross on Hoyle for awhile. I put together Jennifer's Easy Bake Oven. Now, that oven is not an Easy anything. You have to read the manual to do anything with it. We watched Harry Peter: Prisoner of Archisaban or something like that (I still haven't watched it all the way), but the kidswere glued to the TV while it was on. I broke out 2 water rockets that launched 10 feet in the air exploded on impact when landing. What a rip off those things are. Anyway, it was a good day for everybody.
Sunday, January 02, 2005 at 04:56:44 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Dreams can be nightmares, or insite to a better life
I drempt about Rob, being frantic over being obsolete at Mgm. He panicked. He'd done a lot of exceptional things for that company.
I drempt about me, getting called in to Mgm for something minor.
But I knew I was on my way out. My purpose all along was to program my way out of a job and not into one. My goal was to make a perfect system that was easy to maintain. I knew my last day would come and there wouldn't be a going away party. It was my plan. I was supposed to design a system that was so easy to use,. One didn't need 14 programmers to maintain it. I knew I was working my way out of the job, and my last day would be simply walking by the cubicals, shaking hands, and saying its been nice working with you.
At Mgm Grand, I took a million lines of code and macro'd it up. I automated programming.
A new program request could be keyed in on one line (not thousands). You would key in that request and take a coffee break. I reduced the staff from 9 people to 2. I automated the systems, so now, its a box sitting in the corner of the Mirage computer room. When I was done, and I had trained everyone concerned, I cried as I walked out the door. I earned around one half a million dollars for that contract, and I was the only person that knew what I'd done.
There are still people out there who code the old grump way
They key in ever line of code instead of writing a program to create the code. They don't use macros.
They still have their jobs. They've made themselves necessary. Noone can read their code. They are unfirable.
Rob knew his accomplishments, but didn't have faith in his ability to recreate them.
He took on a dead end job at a glass factory, then shot himself. He thought he lost his abilities. He thought he was more useful dead than alive. He lost his self esteem.
I've thought the same thing about myself, that I'm a has-been.
The truth is, my goal all along was to work my way out of a job. To make perfect systems. I have done that. My systems are still out there working. They won't be replaced for perhaps a decade. I'm semi-retired because of what I did. I forget sometimes how I got here. That's what I should hold onto.
Its what you do and what you are that makes you special
I've felt suicidal (who hasn't), but that would be a waste. There's more to come in my life. I'm going to do something special and I know that because I know myself. I have self esteem.
But then again I'll do something special, then probably die in a car accident on the way home or something else stupid like that. lol. Life's biggest surprise it seems is death. Isn't it ironic that all creatures have a built in survival instinct plus a built in mechanism for dying.
It's what you accomplish in life that counts.
Saturday, January 01, 2005 at 16:22:01 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Should auld acquaintance be forgot
It seems I've lost all contact with Ruth (my wife for 10 years). Its sad to lose contact with someone you still love. I wish her well in life. I still love her. Things just didn't work out. She was a very special person to me. Incompatibility is a sad thing. You lose a part of your life when you lose someone you love. I'm surprised she didn't call me this holiday. I can't reach her easily. She probably hates me anyway. So sad
Saturday, January 01, 2005 at 15:55:27 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
I hope I didn't bother anyone last night
I called Larry Lewis, Tom Sawyer, Allen Harman, Ruth (my ex), and a few other people. Tom Sawyer built me up like you wouldn't believe. It seems people have more confidence in me than I have in my self, and thats a shame. Allen Harman's daughter talked up a storm. She's only 8 but talks like a 12 year old. Becky got mad at me because I compared her to Jennifer. I didn't mean any harm. I was just comparing two 8 year olds and their level of understanding. Hey, we all have our strengths and weaknesses. Jennifer can spell anything backwards. It's a rare gift.
Saturday, January 01, 2005 at 15:17:06 (PST) <Jim Cutlar>
Here I sit with a well deserved hangover
We (mainly me) had 5 bottles of champagne last night. That means I shouldn't drive for at least 3 days. I'm grounded. Hecko. To add to my disgrace, Becky's Mom is coming over to pick up Becky's kids clothes. That's because I'm the only one in the house who can drive, and I won't after I've been drinking. Well, at least I have some integrety. I won't put anybody at risk because of my drinking.
Tue 
02/01/2005 12:02:01
 jim  Vegas,NV-Gabriel BackYard
Tue 
02/01/2005 10:09:49
 jim  Have you ever tried to plan your retirement?
Think about disabilty.
Among the other things Sonny and I talked about was retirement planning.
I know that I can receive $1,500 a month on disability now.
Or I could wait for Social Security and get $800 at 62, or $1,500 at 70.
Lets do some math on that $1,500 disability!:
$1,500 a month x 12 = $18,000 a year.
Add on Food Stamps: $100 x 12 = $1,200 a year + $18,000 = $19,200 a year total.
I'd have to have invested $340,000 at 5% interest to equal a disabilty income of $19,000.
I'm not even going to mention taxation rules on disability.
But that's no all -- Medicaid kicks and the health insurance is free at a 0% deductable.
All health needs are free. I could go to the doctor to treat a cold!
Well, simply put, I can't get that period.
Insurance for me at 49 with preexisting conditions would cost $800 a month with a $5,000 deductable, and I pay 20% after the deductable is met.
In other words, $100,000 in health care would cost me $25,000.
For argument's sake, I'll use the $800 I would pay for crappy insurance. $800 x 12 = $9,600 a year.
I would have to have $192,000 a year invested at 5% to pay for crappier health insurance than Medicaide.
I should mention at this point, I can get Albuterol through the internet for $10 an inhaler. Through insurance, the pharmacist wants $80 an inhaler, so we in the United States have incredibly inflated prices on pharmaceutical goods.
$340,000 + $192,000 = $532,000
To equal the the benifits of those on disability I'd need $532,000 invested at 5%.
In other words, even when I was consulting making $140,000 a year, I never had a chance to retire early.
But I mentioned disability didn't I? How do you get that?
I know several people, one in Hawaii (ex-teacher,alcoholic), one in Sacramento (no occupation,panic attacks), that got on disability. You either get a social security lawyer or know the ropes, get a physicalogist referral, shift your assets if any, file the papers and BINGO, you've become the equivalent of a $500,000 retiree at 49. The girl in Hawaii gets free housing near the beach, and Hawaii even pays for auto insurance. Its not fair is it?
Now, a lot of people were raised not to think this way.
But who is smarter, the parents that taught their kids not to work the system and to work until their 70, or the people who are now working the system? Who had more free time to enjoy life?
Mon 
01/31/2005 22:54:50
 jim  Joes Crabshack and the Universes Creation
Sonny, Becky and I ate a Joes Crab Shack
But never mind that...we got into descussion about free electrons, free protons and yada.....
But never mind that...We stumbled on this cool link about the creation of the universe!
PBS's interactive timeline of the universes creation.
Mon 
01/31/2005 21:36:46
 jim  ENERGY AND VIGOR ARE PRECIOUS!
Vacuumed the ductworks, ceiling fan, cleaned the air filter, washed the windows. Blew off the front and back porches. Cleaned and cloroxed the water softener's brine tank and resin bed. Refilled the brine tank with 240lbs of sodium nitrate. Cleaned the 60" TV screen (that's not as easy as it sounds) and realigned the guns. This place smells great.
Oddly enough, I tested my eyesight earlier today and my right eye stunk. Eight hours later, after airing out the house and working outside alot, it's back to being okay.
Mon 
01/31/2005 12:00:19
 jim  Vegas,NV-Gabriel-Jim-Mod-TreeTruck
Mon 
01/31/2005 10:15:22
 jim  Web Research: Eye Exams...
I did some researching into my failing eyesight and found this
Check out this link: Shows a variety of ailments
Check out this link: Serious Eye Exam
Check out this link too: Test Eye Memory
You'll be amazed at your results.
Mon 
01/31/2005 08:20:31
 jim  Ah, what a beautiful morning
I feel clear finally. I can see much better. We slept good. It's been quite a while since I've felt this kind of energy. Yipee!
Back to my sick house...what is the problem here? I turned the heat down, its cool in here, but I feel good now. I got to thinking about my air conditioner and it's past. The heat exchanger has cracked twice in the past leaking loads of CO into the house. I'd that f'er cracked again. It must have a poor design to it.
Today, I'm going to install Carbon Monoxide Detectors, check the air conditioner heat exchange, check the exhaust for the water heater, and fix a small leak in my bathrooms skylight.
Becky's going to vacuum everything and dust everything.
We're both going to bleach the water softener system and recharge it.
So it should be a fun day!.
Sun 
01/30/2005 22:42:08
 jim  We might have Carbon Monoxide poisoning
Now heres a frightening thought.
I'd never even thought of that. The roofers out here are crap. Two reroofs ago they tiled over a skylight. The last reroof, they sprayed on styrofoam. I wouldn't even be surprised if they blocked up my gas water heater vent. It's in the center of the house.
I you want a shabby roof job, get one in Vegas BTW.
I've had 5 roofs in 20 years. Not a very good average. And those guy, well, they do terrible work with little recourse to get back at them. They own nothing. They hire bums. Their bond is a joke. The Nevada State Commission fines them $120 for $200,000 of bad roofs with code violations. They pay and stay, or don't pay and open shop in Arizona for 5 years, then come back. It's a terribly bad deal for homeowners here.
Sun 
01/30/2005 15:49:29
 jim  I now know what’s been making me ill
It's not anything I thought it was. We've been hanging around the house for almost all of December and January. I went out today. After 3 hours, my throat's not sore, I don't ache, my heads almost all the way clear, and I'm not sweating. Sheesh.
My house has spores somewhere
Sun 
01/30/2005 10:15:07
 jim  Los Estados Unidos de América?
Ever wonder if someday we'll refer to this country as "Los Estados Unidos de América" someday?
Maybe “Bring Me Your Tired, Your Poor, Your Criminals…” applies to this country.
But so does "Bring Me Your Business and We'll Create A Better World"
Immigration laws are changing all of the time. It's too bad the world's countries can't drop their borders and let this be a free world for all people. But, the United States is the most powerful country in the world. We can't share that, can we now?
Greed is the force that drives nature.
Sun 
01/30/2005 10:03:18
 jim  I love fresh ideas!
I have a story of creation and the end based on the constant decay of protons, but I'll save that for another day when I have more time.
Today may be a mountainous snow day for Becky and the kids.
I still feel like crap though. Becky and I didn't get to sleep until 5am this morning. We're sweating, got sore throats, and I've got a cloud in my head that won't go away.
Sun 
01/30/2005 09:51:28
 jim  Ida is The Happy Housekeeper
Ida's thinking about starting a business called "The Happy Housekeeper"
Kind of catchy name don't you think? I like it!
If I don't start feeling better sometime in the next few months, I'm going on disability.
But if I do, I may go with that name. I've have a friend who'll teach me everything I need to know about the janitorial business in Las Vegas.
Once again, thanks Ida.
Sun 
01/30/2005 09:42:17
 jim  Temporin: The temporary cavity filler
Temporin: A temporary cavity filler that I heard about from Ida
Thanks Ida! I knew it wasn't anebesol. I've got a cavity that bugs the heck out of me. You're an Angel Ida. I used some stuff before that lasted two weeks.
I'd like to have the stuff that the dentist uses. I'm sure its got to be cheaper than two visits totalling $400 for one tooth.
Sun 
01/30/2005 00:06:11
 jim  Choked on Cube Steak.
Hot Dangit!
I ate some cube steak. It stuck. That's twice this month. I'm lucky to get it down. The last time I couldn't, it cost $5,000 for surgery.
Sometimes, I think nature is cruel to let us grow old and frail, but I know somehow its in Gods plan.
I'm really sorry to hear my Dad is losing Lottie (his wife for twenty years).
She's going to a home that can care for her. She's Eighty. He's Eighty-Two. That seems to be a cruel reality of nature.
Sun 
01/30/2005 00:00:14
 jim  Vegas,NV-Joy,Jennifer
Sat 
01/29/2005 17:15:25
 Ida  Becky & Jim here’s a stress reliever game you may
http://www.davidandgoliathtees.com/games/throwrocks.html
Sat 
01/29/2005 15:28:18
 jim  Anyway, the bottom line is
We should:
- move out of state
- get the health care we so desparately need
- get some money coming in
And we should do it in the next few months
Sat 
01/29/2005 13:56:38
 jim  Save my soul I’m going down for the last time
Well, not really. But I know things have to change.
I helped Robert out with his truck.
I towed it, then paid for the Car Doctor to fix it. That was money I needed.
He wrecked the truck and wanted my help to get to work. I told him to find another way. I was hungover and wouldn't drive. I won't risk having a seizure on the road. Then he asked to borrow my truck. I said no. Somewhere along the way, someone told Grandmal that I'd been drinking.
Grandmal is going after Becky for child support
She kicks Becky out so she can live with the kids rent free. Steals Beckys last SS check. Then goes after Becky for child support, meaning Becky should move out of state. And she thinks she's teaching the kids good ways. Wonderful example!
I'm helping Skip get his act together
Any money I give him goes to alcohol or gambling. He is trying to find work though. But it'll cost me for him to find work.
I let David stay the night last night.
We watched movies, and got two large pizza's. He hit me up for money today.
I'm an alcoholic, and I need help
I don't want to die, but I will if I don't get help. My mind is going, I have a host of problems (carpal tunnel and hip pain). I can't afford health insurance. My mind needs to be retrained. I need insurance or to go on disability.
I'll be broke in two years
I wouldn't hire someone like me. People think I'm made of money because I have property. I earned everything I have. I'll end up homeless if things don't change. How many people can I help when nothing is coming in?
On the plus side
Becky loves me with all of her heart. It's mutual. Most of the people I know would be lucky to have love like ours.
Mikey has turned out to be one of the most honorable people I've ever known.
Sonny is totally trustworthy.
Skip when he gets his act together will overpay me everything that I've thrown his way.
I still have my integrety. I care, I help people, I do nice things for people every day. I'm a good person.
But I need help now or I'll die.
These are the days of my life.
Thu 
01/27/2005 10:19:00
 Mike  Jimmy... What you up to these days?
That Linux I bought at Fly's hosed my system. It went and totally repartitioned my HDD even when I said not to do so. Now I am fighting to get the liptop running again. Have a recent backup, but it's a pain. In a Internet Cafe right now. Long live MS Windows... Down with Linux... At least poorly written installation packages. Oh, btw, Good Morning Ms. Rebecca (Grandma)...
Thu 
01/27/2005 05:11:27
 jim  I woke up early this morning around 4am
Already, I've chatted with Allen Harmon (who's in Missouri).
Jeanette just called (who's in California).
David and Sonny came over yesterday, and my phone was ringing off the hook.
Jeanette worry's me. It's a strange time to call.
She talked to me like Rob did before he committed suicide.
That's a scary thought but they definitely have a purpose.
Wed 
01/26/2005 12:00:09
 jim  Vegas,NV-David
Tue 
01/25/2005 20:45:35
 Ida  WELL JUST FINISHED CHATTING WITH THE NEW FELLA...
HEY JIM! WELL JUST FINISHED CHATTING WITH THE NEW FELLA........tOM'S HIS NAME....LOL......AND HE THREW ME A HUGE CURVE.....AS WE TALKED FOR THE LONGEST TIME......HE SAYS.......NOT BEING TOO FORWARD .........BUT I THINK IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT.........I JUST FROZE IN MY CHAIR HERE AS EVERY NERVE IN MY BODY TINGLED..........IT WAS THE STRANGEST FEELING I'VE HAD...........I WAS STUNNED........AT A LOSS FOR WORDS......I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO REPLY........HE MAKES ME HAPPY.....I AM SO GLAD I CONSENTED TO MEET WITH HIM AFTER HE HOUNDED ME FOR WEEKS.....WE HAVE GREAT TIMES TOGETHER(NOT JUST SEX EITHER)......WE BOTH HAVE MUCH IN COMMON. AND HE LIVES IN THE WOODS ON 15 BEAUTIFUL ACRES OF LAND THAT HE OWNS..WHAT I MEAN IS...IT'S PAID FOR.......WHO KNOWS?????LOL.....JUST MAYBE.........MAYBE....THIS COULD BE HIM.......LOL....BUT WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS BEFORE.........LOL.....TIME WILL TELL......HUGS ......LUV YA TWO..........

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