I have a story of creation and the end based on the constant decay of protons, but I'll save that for another day when I have more time.
Today may be a mountainous snow day for Becky and the kids.
I still feel like crap though. Becky and I didn't get to sleep until 5am this morning. We're sweating, got sore throats, and I've got a cloud in my head that won't go away.

Ida's thinking about starting a business called "The Happy Housekeeper"
Kind of catchy name don't you think? I like it!
If I don't start feeling better sometime in the next few months, I'm going on disability.
But if I do, I may go with that name. I've have a friend who'll teach me everything I need to know about the janitorial business in Las Vegas.
Once again, thanks Ida.

Temporin: A temporary cavity filler that I heard about from Ida
Thanks Ida! I knew it wasn't anebesol. I've got a cavity that bugs the heck out of me. You're an Angel Ida. I used some stuff before that lasted two weeks.
I'd like to have the stuff that the dentist uses. I'm sure its got to be cheaper than two visits totalling $400 for one tooth.

Hot Dangit!
I ate some cube steak. It stuck. That's twice this month. I'm lucky to get it down. The last time I couldn't, it cost $5,000 for surgery.
Sometimes, I think nature is cruel to let us grow old and frail, but I know somehow its in Gods plan.
I'm really sorry to hear my Dad is losing Lottie (his wife for twenty years).
She's going to a home that can care for her. She's Eighty. He's Eighty-Two. That seems to be a cruel reality of nature.

http://www.davidandgoliathtees.com/games/throwrocks.html

We should:
- move out of state
- get the health care we so desparately need
- get some money coming in
And we should do it in the next few months

Well, not really. But I know things have to change.
I helped Robert out with his truck.
I towed it, then paid for the Car Doctor to fix it. That was money I needed.
He wrecked the truck and wanted my help to get to work. I told him to find another way. I was hungover and wouldn't drive. I won't risk having a seizure on the road. Then he asked to borrow my truck. I said no. Somewhere along the way, someone told Grandmal that I'd been drinking.
Grandmal is going after Becky for child support
She kicks Becky out so she can live with the kids rent free. Steals Beckys last SS check. Then goes after Becky for child support, meaning Becky should move out of state. And she thinks she's teaching the kids good ways. Wonderful example!
I'm helping Skip get his act together
Any money I give him goes to alcohol or gambling. He is trying to find work though. But it'll cost me for him to find work.
I let David stay the night last night.
We watched movies, and got two large pizza's. He hit me up for money today.
I'm an alcoholic, and I need help
I don't want to die, but I will if I don't get help. My mind is going, I have a host of problems (carpal tunnel and hip pain). I can't afford health insurance. My mind needs to be retrained. I need insurance or to go on disability.
I'll be broke in two years
I wouldn't hire someone like me. People think I'm made of money because I have property. I earned everything I have. I'll end up homeless if things don't change. How many people can I help when nothing is coming in?
On the plus side
Becky loves me with all of her heart. It's mutual. Most of the people I know would be lucky to have love like ours.
Mikey has turned out to be one of the most honorable people I've ever known.
Sonny is totally trustworthy.
Skip when he gets his act together will overpay me everything that I've thrown his way.
I still have my integrety. I care, I help people, I do nice things for people every day. I'm a good person.
But I need help now or I'll die.
These are the days of my life.

That Linux I bought at Fly's hosed my system. It went and totally repartitioned my HDD even when I said not to do so. Now I am fighting to get the liptop running again. Have a recent backup, but it's a pain. In a Internet Cafe right now. Long live MS Windows... Down with Linux... At least poorly written installation packages. Oh, btw, Good Morning Ms. Rebecca (Grandma)...

Already, I've chatted with Allen Harmon (who's in Missouri).
Jeanette just called (who's in California).
David and Sonny came over yesterday, and my phone was ringing off the hook.
Jeanette worry's me. It's a strange time to call.
She talked to me like Rob did before he committed suicide.
That's a scary thought but they definitely have a purpose.

HEY JIM! WELL JUST FINISHED CHATTING WITH THE NEW FELLA........tOM'S HIS NAME....LOL......AND HE THREW ME A HUGE CURVE.....AS WE TALKED FOR THE LONGEST TIME......HE SAYS.......NOT BEING TOO FORWARD .........BUT I THINK IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT.........I JUST FROZE IN MY CHAIR HERE AS EVERY NERVE IN MY BODY TINGLED..........IT WAS THE STRANGEST FEELING I'VE HAD...........I WAS STUNNED........AT A LOSS FOR WORDS......I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO REPLY........HE MAKES ME HAPPY.....I AM SO GLAD I CONSENTED TO MEET WITH HIM AFTER HE HOUNDED ME FOR WEEKS.....WE HAVE GREAT TIMES TOGETHER(NOT JUST SEX EITHER)......WE BOTH HAVE MUCH IN COMMON. AND HE LIVES IN THE WOODS ON 15 BEAUTIFUL ACRES OF LAND THAT HE OWNS..WHAT I MEAN IS...IT'S PAID FOR.......WHO KNOWS?????LOL.....JUST MAYBE.........MAYBE....THIS COULD BE HIM.......LOL....BUT WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS BEFORE.........LOL.....TIME WILL TELL......HUGS ......LUV YA TWO..........

AFTER JUST RECEIVING AN EMAIL FROM A FRIEND I THOUGHT LONG AND HARD.......... AND THIS IS WHAT I CAME UP WITH: IT SEEMS YEARS AGO PEOPLE LIVED LONGER, WENT TO THE DOCTOR LESS. KIND OF MAKES YOU THINK A LOT ABOUT THIS FACT. DO YOU THINK ALL THE PRESERVATIVES THAT IS IN EVERYTHING HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS? WE ADDED PRESERVATIVES TO PRESERVE FOOD........BUT IS IT PRESERVING US? OR DESTROYING US? ARE WE NOT GOING TO THE DOCTORS MORE DUE TO HEART PROBLEMS,DIABETES,CANCER.....BECAUSE OF ALL THE PRESERVATIVES THAT ARE IN JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING WE CONSUME OR USE IN OUR EVERYDAY NORMAL LIVES. NOT ONLY IS IT IN THE FOOD WE EAT BUT ALSO IN THE THINGS WE USE TO CLEANSE OURSELVES WITH. GOOD HEALTHY EATING OF COMMON FOODS KEPT US FROM BEING SICK. GOOD CLEANSING WITH NOT ALL THE ADDITIVES KEPT US CLEAN AND FRESH SMELLING, FOR WE WERE CLEAN AND NOT MASKED WITH ALL THESE PERFUMES ETC. FARM ANIMALS WERE NOT INJECTED WITH MEDS TO MAKE THEM GROW MORE OR LARGER THEY WERE GRAZING NATURALLY. EVERYTHING WAS NATURAL AND NOT ARTIFICIAL. EVEN TO THE TOBACCO PEOPLE ROLLED THEIR OWN AS THEY GREW THE TOBACCO WITHOUT ALL THE ADDITIVES TO KEEP IT FRESH? SO IS THIS WHY A LOT OF PEOPLE DIE FROM CIGARETTES NOW? SO ALL IN ALL ARE THESE THINGS REALLY GOOD? LIKE DOES MILK REALLY DO A BODY GOOD? JUST WHAT IS IN THE MILK? OR ANYTHING ELSE FOR THAT MATTER?.........THINK ABOUT THIS AND GIVE ME YOUR VIEWS ON THIS ........

I'm not sure what that means...who'se god, who believes in God these days.
Let me say this...in all of the worlds intracasies, with all of life's secrets, how can we not believe there's a designer.

A Penny. You always hear the usual stories of pennies on the sidewalk being good luck, gifts from angels, etc. This is the first time I've ever heard this twist on the story. Gives you something to think about. Several years ago, a friend of mine and her husband were invited to spend the weekend at the husband's employer's home. My friend, Arlene, was nervous about the weekend. The boss was very wealthy, with a fine home on the waterway, and cars costing more than her house. The first day and evening went well, and Arlene was delighted to have this rare glimpse into how the very wealthy live. The husband's employer was quite generous as a host, and took them to the finest restaurants. Arlene knew she would never have the opportunity to indulge in this kind of extravagance again, so was enjoying herself immensely. As the three of them were about to enter an exclusive restaurant that evening, the boss was walking slightly ahead of Arlene and her husband. He stopped suddenly, looking down on the pavement for a long, silent moment. Arlene wondered if she was supposed to pass him. There was nothing on the ground except a single darkened penny that someone had dropped, and a few cigarette butts. Still silent, the man reached down and picked up the penny. He held it up and smiled, then put it in his pocket as if he had found a great treasure. How absurd! What need did this man have for a single penny? Why would he even take the time to stop and pick it up? Throughout dinner, the entire scene nagged at her. Finally, she could stand it no longer. She causally mentioned that her daughter once had a coin collection, and asked if the penny he had found had been of some value. A smile crept across the man's face as he reached into his pocket for the penny and held it out for her to see. She had seen many pennies before! What was the point of this? "Look at it." He said. "Read what it says." She read the words "United States of America." "No, not that; read further." "One cent?" "No, keep reading." "In God we Trust?" "Yes!" "And?" "And if I trust in God, the name of God is holy, even on a coin. Whenever I find a coin I see that inscription. It is written on every single United States coin, but we never seem to notice it! God drops a message right in front of me telling me to trust Him? Who am I to pass it by? When I see a coin, I pray, I stop to see if my trust IS in God at that moment. I pick the coin up as a response to God; that I do trust in Him. For a short time, at least, I cherish it as if it were gold.. I think it is God's way of starting a conversation with me. Lucky for me, God is patient and pennies are plentiful. When I was out shopping today, I found a penny on the sidewalk. I stopped and picked it up, and realized that I had been worrying and fretting in my mind about things I cannot change. I read the words, "In God We Trust," and had to laugh. Yes, God, I get the message. It seems that I have been finding an inordinate number of pennies in the last few months, but then, pennies are plentiful! And, God is patient...

Remember thats it is no longer what you can do, it's how well you are liked.
That's the key.

Here, I splat out words thats probably meaningless to most people. To some, its a chance to say something. This is my chance to make a difference.

Still, I have nothing laughable as a job. Nobody want's to hire me with an attidude like I'm better than everyone else. I wanna be a nigger! LOL

A paradox is a structure that ends where it begins, like the beginning of a circle.
A paradox is life.
Why should we be necessary to this world. Viruses retain their memories from life time to life time. They infect an absorbent cell. They have no means to reproduce. They just infect. They are the retaineres of the secrets of life.

Ever get stuck on a phrase? The truth is a lie yet discovered.
I love you means that some day I'll hate you.
Someday, never comes!
God is love! And he'll strike you down in hell fire if you don't worship him!
Ya know what I especially love about this life...it's my dog. Squirt loves me unconditionally. He's right here at my feet, right now. He doesn't care that I'm simi-wasted. He's just there, giving me his all.
Most of the people I know now are wonderful
Of all the people I know now, there's only a few that I object too. Even they aren't that bad. They mean good. And, well, isn't that all that counts. Nobody's so smart that they predict how things will fall once an item is laid down.
I think that if we try to do good, without telling everyone that your neighbor Mrs Brown needs to be HUNG
Then you're on the right track! **smiles**

Becky's mom brought Dustin and Jennifer over, then she picked them up four hours later. That was GREAT! I didn't want to be out there driving around.
Robert said Joy's dad (or granddad) wrecked Robert's truck
Uh Oh! That's incredibly bad news. I mentioned quietly destroying the vehicle (like most people do), but now, that's not possible unless the whole thing is totally demolished. sheesh.
I did something terrible.
Robert asked me if he could use my truck. I turned him down. My reasons were thoroughly selfish. Self preservation should be at the top of anyone's list. Giving should be second. If giving is first, then you've got to have faith in God to take care of you. I can't rely on God myself. I just think he acts through me.

LOL..rocking today or so it seems. I love squirty he types so well.
Where is my picture of this cute little pup?

Its the thing....its about love and the place...feel yourself...feel the place!

I've got to say this!
My dreams about going north, when the roads run out...when I'm at the worlds freezing point is not about me committing suicide...it's about self preservation.
I believe, in 20 years or so, science will have the ability to raise the dead. I would want to be one of exceptional people. You don't get that way by being a meter reader. You get that way by being exceptional or different.
Think about it...why would future society dig you up?

Mike, Becky, Sonny, Joy, Robert, Cheryl, Jan, Rob, Timmy...all you guys
The world works on momentum.
100 years, nothing will matter, except for the way we care about each other.
These moments are so special! Thanks for being in my life!

Mike spent the day with us. Never mind, that I had a few drinks on Wednesday and have to drink to avoid a seizure...never mind that thats just the way it is.
I loved the day because Mike was here. He's just a simple, but beautiful person! So kind. Totally generous. He's just a good man. Like the man I hope I'll be some day.
I've padded my world with people like Mike.
They aren't rich. They aren't exceptional by national standards. They are special by my standards. These are the people I didn't have time for back when I was so busy building a career.

Wow I woke up after sleeping 14 hrs tonight I slept so good even though the bed is hard as a rock I slept awesome. Jim comes in talking about dreams, you know dreams are a wonderful thing to me it takes me to another world we dont even know exist and its just another part of u that nobody else can get into to. well Jim and Mike are off to the road again. Oh yea Hello Mike good to see you. well love u all

Hello. My name is Squirty, and I am Jim and rebecca's little puppy dog. Excuse me for any mistyped words, as I never went to school and my paws don't fit this keyboard. Just wanted to thank everybody for the attention, but who is that guy in the brown shirt who keeps calling me a cat?

- Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.
- Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
- It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
- Eat crap in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.
- If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
- If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
- Never buy a car you can't push.
- If you put both feet in your mouth you won't have a leg to stand on
- Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer you live.
- Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened.
- We could learn a lot from crayons:
some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors but they all have to learn to live in the same box.
- A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
- Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
Live Well, Laugh Often, Love Much

Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and days of auld lang syne?
For auld lang syne, my dear, for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup of kindness yet, for auld lang syne.
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and days of auld lang syne?
And here's a hand, my trusty friend And gie's a hand o' thine
We'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet For auld lang syne
Here's an excerpt from the song I just don't understand
We twa hae run aboot the braes
And pu'd the gowans fine.
We've wandered mony a weary foot, Sin' auld lang syne.
LOL Everyone!

Just be glad you're here and not Phuket, Thailand.

Rob was inadvertantly responsible for me writing the code. I wanted to create an online memorial for him. Somewhere along the line, I learned to use Dreamweaver, Visual Studio.net, code HTML and Javascript from memory, and work with the most ugly language I've ever seen, PERL.